Emma H
Forum Replies Created
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Hi Kostas,
Around the 5 to 6-month mark, babies can begin to connect their sleep cycles during daytime naps, leading to longer periods of sleep. However, this is more likely to happen if they:
– nap in an environment that is both quiet and dark
– and they can self-soothe and fall asleep independently.
If their napping environment is bright, or if there are abrupt loud sounds, or if they rely on assistance to fall asleep (such as being fed or rocked), they might find it difficult to connect sleep cycles, resulting in shorter naps.
With this in mind, I recommend Helen starts to have her naps in the crib, and you use the settling pyramid to help her learn how to fall asleep on her own for naps. Doing this ensures that Helen is napping in an environment that is conducive to sleep and she has the skills to fall asleep independently. This in turn will make it more likely that she will start to link sleep cycles when she is capable of doing so at 5 – 6 months of age.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Maddie,
I’m sorry to hear the past few weeks have been tough, especially with your little one being unwell. It’s always difficult to see them like that, and I hope things are starting to improve.
It seems like your baby’s sleep patterns are evolving, and she’s now experiencing four sleep cycles, waking up in between. The reason she may be continuing to wake up between sleep cycles is because she still feels unwell. If this is the case, you might find that she naturally starts to link sleep cycles. However, if you find these frequent wake-ups continue, here are some strategies to help her get back to sleeping better through the night.
1. Identify if she is waking overnight due to hunger or comfort.
Document each overnight feed for a few days to differentiate between hunger-driven and comfort-driven wakings. For breastfeeding, note the duration of each feed; for bottle feeding, record how much she drinks.
After collecting this information, review it to see which feeds were likely due to genuine hunger — indicated by longer breastfeeding times or higher amounts of milk consumed — and which were likely for comfort, shown by shorter feeds or less milk consumed.
2. For comfort-driven wakes, use other soothing strategies to help her fall asleep
If she wakes up during the night looking for comfort, it’s best to try not to feed her to sleep, as this can become a hard habit to break later on. Instead, you can gently rock or bounce her in your arms and gradually reduce the amount of hands-on strategies you’re applying while she is in your arms. For example, when she is lying in your arms, rock her, as you gently pat her bottom and ‘shush’ her. Then, as she settles down, stop rocking her (so stand still) and continue patting her bottom and shushing. If she remains calm, stop patting her and continue shushing. Then stop shushing so that she falls asleep in your arms while you’re standing still. Then, place her in the crib. Stopping the rocking and patting before she falls asleep helps her become comfortable with falling asleep without movement (so she is not reliant on movement to fall asleep). This will make it easier to move to using the pyramid technique when you’re both ready.
3. Separate feedings from naps
It sounds like she is currently feeding to fall asleep during daytime naps. It would be good to separate the feed from the nap, if possible, by adopting the wake, feed, play, and then sleep pattern during the day.
4. Have a consistent nap and bedtime routine
When she is tired and it’s time to help her fall asleep during the day, have a consistent nap routine that you do. Do this nap routine even if you plan to have her sleep on you, in the pram, or in a baby carrier. A quick and consistent nap routine will signal that sleep is coming and it’s time to wind down. This routine will become a sleep cue you can use when you’re ready to attempt naps in the crib. Also, ensure the last activity in this routine is calming. For example, your baby’s nap routine could be: change her diaper, put on a sleeping bag, go into the bedroom, close the blinds, turn on the white noise machine, turn off the lights and then sing her a lullaby while you rock her in your arms.
5. Try the settling pyramid if you have the time and energy.
When it’s time to settle her to sleep, if you have the energy, use the settling pyramid (as this gives her a chance to practice falling asleep in the crib with your support). If you need to climb to the top of the pyramid and pick her up, check your energy levels. If you have the time and energy, you can settle her back down, and when she is calm, put her back in the crib and descend the pyramid following her cues. If you don’t have the energy or time, or she is too distressed, settle her to sleep in your arms, using the gentler steps I outlined in point 2.
6. Just try the first nap of the day
If you don’t have the energy or time to apply the settling pyramid for every nap, just use it for the first nap of the day. Babies tend to find it easier to fall asleep for this nap, so you’re more likely to have success.
7. Have a consistent wake-up time.
Wake her up within the same 30-minute window every morning. This will help in the maturation of her circadian rhythm, which in turn will lead to more consistent bedtimes and encourage more sleep overnight.
I hope these tips help and things get easier soon.
Emma
Also good luck with the move!
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Hi Vivian,
I hope you had a great Easter too!
The reason your little one might appear hyperactive just before bedtime is due to something called the “wake maintenance zone”. This is a period in the evening when your baby naturally feels more awake and energetic. This happens a few hours before their normal bedtime and can result in them seeming unusually alert or hyper, even if they’ve been up for a long stretch and should theoretically be tired.
This natural peak in alertness is the body’s way of saying it’s not quite ready to sleep yet, despite any signs of overtiredness they may have shown earlier.
Understanding this can help you adjust your approach to bedtime. Instead of fighting this burst of energy, you can use it as a cue to start winding down with quieter, more soothing activities that signal to your baby that bedtime is coming.
For the next few nights, I recommend you write down the time your little one falls asleep at bedtime and see if there is a pattern. As your little one is getting older you may notice that the length of time he can stay awake for will need to increase before bedtime to ensure he is tired enough to fall asleep.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Christine,
As you have noticed, having a bath can help babies fall asleep, so if you can time it before his last nap of the day then that’s perfect.Emma
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Hi Christine,
I’m glad you have found the course helpful! Hopefully, it is helping make things a little clearer for you.
When you ask if there is a way to cancel out the early morning waking, I assume you mean to get him to sleep past 7am. I have answered this question below, but if that isn’t what you meant, let me know.
Unfortunately, it’s common for babies to start their day between 6 and 7 am. This is just a typical circadian rhythm for infants, so getting them to sleep past 7 am is generally challenging.
Given that 6 – 7 am is their preferred wake-up time, the way to get your son to sleep for longer overnight is to move his bedtime earlier. I don’t think moving his bedtime earlier will mean that he will wake up earlier, as this is his usual wake-up time. However, the way to ensure this doesn’t happen is to gradually shift his bedtime to an earlier time. And by gradual, I mean shifting his bedtime 15 minutes earlier every two days. This will give his circadian rhythm time to adjust. You would continue to shift his bedtime 15 minutes earlier until one of two things happens:
1. You reach your desired bedtime
2. Your baby starts to wake up earlier in the morning. If this happens, he is reaching his overnight sleep requirements before your desired wake-up time and waking up earlier as he don’t need any more sleep. To fix this, you just shift his bedtime 15 minutes later, and he should go back to waking at 6:30/7am.
In addition to shifting his bedtime earlier, you will also need to:
– Watch the time his last nap of the day ends. You want to make sure he is tired enough to fall asleep at the new bedtime. At this age, he may be able to tolerate staying awake for 2 – 21/2 hours before needing to nap again. So you need to make sure he wakes from his final nap of the day 2 – 21/2 hours before the new bedtime.
– Dim the lights 1 hour before the new bedtime. This will help encourage his body to release melatonin, making it easier for him to fall asleep.
I hope this helps
Emma
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Hi Amanda,
It’s great to hear you have found the content helpful.
Just wanted to make sure that I have a clear picture in my head of your little one’s night before I provide a suggestion.
This is what I am picturing: Your LO goes to bed around 7.30-8 pm and sleeps until 10/11 pm at which point she has a feed. She then goes back to sleep and stays asleep until 3 am at which point she wakes and then continues to wake every 1.5 – 2.5 hours for a feed until she wakes for the day sometime between 7 and 8am? So her feeding times overnight are 10/11pm, 3am, 4:30am, 6am, 7:30am?
Thanks
Emma
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Hi Erica,
Congratulations on your new arrival!
Having a newborn can feel overwhelming, so I hope you’re managing alright and have some support from family or friends.
There could be a few reasons for the changes you have noticed with your little one.
1. Your little one is becoming more alert!
In the early weeks, your son probably fell asleep easily during or right after feedings, and you could move him to the bassinet without waking him. But as babies grow, they become more aware of their surroundings, making it harder to transfer them to the bassinet during the day without waking them.
It is a little different at night, as your baby’s circadian rhythm and sleep pressure work together to encourage your little one to fall asleep. This may be why he continues sleeping when you transfer him into the bassinet at night.
2. The Period of PURPLE Crying
A potential reason for your baby’s fussiness during the day is the Period of PURPLE Crying. This is a normal developmental stage that most babies go through, which starts at around two weeks of age, and initially, your little one might just seem fussier or cry more than usual without any apparent reason. This fussiness builds up gradually over the next few weeks, reaching a peak when your baby is between 6 and 8 weeks old. At its peak, newborns will spend around 3 hours per day fussing and crying without any apparent reason. However, don’t be alarmed if your little one cries a bit longer, as it varies from baby to baby.
After this peak, the amount and intensity of crying and fussing will slowly start to decrease. At 4 months of age, your baby’s crying and fussing episodes should reduce significantly and be spread out more evenly throughout the day. At this stage, it also gets a little easier to understand why your baby is crying.
With that said, I want to quickly mention that sometimes a baby’s fussiness and crying due to pain are misinterpreted as the period of PURPLE crying. Since you mentioned your son is generally fussy throughout the day and becoming challenging to feed, I wanted to talk about how you would tell the difference between the Period of PURPLE Crying and pain.
When it comes to PURPLE crying, the crying/fussiness spells typically follow a certain rhythm, tending to occur at specific times, usually in the late afternoon or evenings. During this phase, your baby might unexpectedly turn fussy or burst into tears, seemingly without an apparent reason. And just as suddenly as it came, this fussiness and crying tends to suddenly stop.
In contrast, if your baby is experiencing discomfort or pain, perhaps due to an infection, irritation, or certain intolerance, their crying would reflect an entirely different pattern.
In these instances, your baby might cry, fuss, or squirm throughout the day without any pattern. This unceasing crying and fussing can give the impression that your baby is never truly settled.
If this is the case with your little one, I recommend you arrange an appointment with their doctor or paediatrician to discuss these behavioural changes.
Regarding how frequently your little one is having a BM, pooping every 2 1/2 days is considered normal. Just monitor the consistency of the poop. If you notice your little one starts to poop pellets, this signals that he may be constipated, and you may need to check in with the doctor about possible causes for this.
To help your little one sleep in the bassinet during the day, I recommend that when he stays awake following a feed and starts to display tired signs, you do a simple nap routine, lie him down awake in this bassinet, and use the settling pyramid to help him fall asleep. Do you think this is something that you can do for some of his naps?
I hope this helps,
Emma
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Hey Jackie and JB,
It’s so good to hear you’re seeing some improvements in your LO’s sleep. I hope they continue and you all get more sleep!
Under 4 months of age, there isn’t really a nap schedule. Naps times and lengths vary. After 4 months a nap schedule may start to emerge if you wake your baby up at the same time every morning. When you have a consistent wake-up time, the first nap of the day tends to occur around the same time. For example, if your baby wakes at 7 am and stays awake for 2 hours then that first nap of the day will start to occur at 9 am. Once that first nap time becomes consistent the second nap time starts to become consistent and so on. By 6 months of age, your baby should have a consistent nap schedule in regards to the time they go to sleep and how long they generally nap for.
When they’re having growth spurts what you will notice is they feed more during the day, as well as night. If you notice they are just feeding more at night then it’s likely not a growth spurt. Sometimes this might be occurring because your LO is getting distracted during the day and having smaller feeds (this tends to happen as they become more aware and interested in the world around them, so they start to feed more overnight. If this is the case, try feeding your LO in a distraction-free room (or a room with fewer distractions) during the day to ensure they have a full feed. If it is a growth spurt it’s ok to feed them. Just make sure you are continuing to help them learn to fall asleep on their own (using the settling pyramid) for their naps. What you want to avoid is falling into the habit of feeding them off to sleep for all naps and bedtime.
The timing of when you go out really depends on you and your little one. If your little one can fall asleep out and about (for example in the baby carrier) then you can go out when it’s nap time. As they get older and the nap times become more consistent (so around 6 months of age) it’s often easier to time outings with wake windows.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Monique,
I am having a great week – the kids are healthy, so I was able to get some things done, which is always good. 😂 Thanks so much for asking!
I’m sorry to hear the first night was tough for your little one.
Unfortunately, it’s normal for the first few nights and days to be a bit rocky. Right now, your baby is used to falling asleep with a pacifier, so taking it away is going to be a challenge for her. She’s going to need some extra support from you to learn how to fall asleep without the pacifier. As she gets used to this new routine, you should notice that her protests reduce.
As for how long you let her cry while you’re rocking her, it really comes down to how you’re all feeling in the moment. If you feel okay with the situation, continue to rock her gently until she calms down or falls asleep (she will calm down – it might take a little while the first night, but the amount of time she is distressed will decrease for the next nap, and the next etc). As you’re rocking her in your arms, make sure your rocking is slow and rhythmical rather than fast and jerky. Doing it fast is alerting and stimulating so it may cause her to fuss more. Also, bobbing up and down in a vertical motion may help her calm down quickly, as moving up and down on a vertical plane is calming.
Sometimes, it can be helpful to view the crying as how your daughter tells you that she is tired and needs your help. And that is precisely what you’re doing as you rock her in your arms.
If you find this approach too distressing, then there is a gentler approach you can try, where you can still use the pacifier in the bedtime and nap routines but remove it just before she drifts off to sleep. It looks like this:
1. When she is tired, let her suck on the pacifier while you complete the pre-sleep routine.
2. At the end of the pre-sleep routine, lay her in her crib with the pacifier still in her mouth.
3. Then, use the settling pyramid to help her fall asleep.
4. Just before she drifts off to sleep, gently remove the pacifier by placing your little finger between the pacifier and the corner of her mouth. This breaks the seal and allows you to pop the pacifier out of her mouth.
5. This works for some babies, and they fall asleep without the pacifier. But for other babies, it may cause them to stir more (at which point you use the settling pyramid to help them fall asleep), and for others, it causes them to wake up fully.
If, after using this method for a few days, you notice that she always wakes up fully when you pop the pacifier out, it indicates that this gentler approach isn’t working, and you may need to remove the pacifier.
Does this make sense?
Emma
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No worries! Glad they helped!
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Hi Kostas,
That sounds great. Hopefully, it’s a great summer!
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Hi Vivian,
How have the last few days gone? Has he continued to wake after one sleep cycle at night?
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Hi Elen,
I hope the last few days have been getting easier for you both.
It’s great that you were able to work out a sleep training method that works for your little one for day naps. I do find as they get older, sometimes being in the room with them is just confusing and can cause them to protest more, as they see you’re in the room and expect you to do what you have previously done. By exiting the room there is a clear ending to the nap routine.
In regards to the timing of her bedtime, it depends. If you find that she is really upset because she is tired at the end of the day you can shift it to 6 pm. But if she is tolerating 6:15 pm then stick with that.
In regards to your little one crying when she is going to sleep. It might be because the nap time is a little too early. For the next few days, I recommend you continue to put her to bed at 11 am and write down what time she falls asleep. If you notice she is falling asleep at 11.30 am then you could try shifting her nap time to 11:30 or 11:20 am and see if she protests less with a later nap time.
It’s also great that she has lengthened her naps to 1 hour instead of 30 minutes. I would expect that her naps will continue to lengthen. The length of time she will nap for depends on her total sleep needs over 24 hours. At this age, 11 – 14 hours of sleep over 24 hours is considered normal. But 2 hours more or 2 hours less is also considered okay. So given that your little one goes to bed at 6:15 pm and sleeps until 6:30am, she is having a little over 12 hours sleep overnight. This means if she needs 14 hours of sleep in 24 hours she might nap for a touch under 2 hours.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Monique,
I do think once she learns how to fall asleep without the pacifier, she will wake less frequently overnight. She is currently waking every sleep cycle and calling out to you to put the pacifier back in, which results in waking every 2 – 21/2 hours. Once she learns how to go to sleep on her own she will not wake as often and she should start sleeping for longer stretches overnight. Her daytime naps should also improve.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Kostas,
It’s great that you have had time to review the course material. Hopefully, it is making sense.
I would say that if Helen goes to bed at 8 pm, wakes at 2:30 am, and then at 4:30/5 am, she’s hungry. What should happen (as she already knows how to fall asleep on her own) is that the first stretch of sleep will gradually lengthen. For example, she might go to bed at 8 pm, and instead of waking at 2.30 am for her first feed, she might wake at 3.30 am. This might increase to 4.30 am. Then, it might move to 5 am. Then, she might not wake up until 6 am.
I don’t recommend dream feeds (where you wake them up at 10 or 11 pm). That first part of the night is when your baby is in deep sleep so they don’t tend to feed well. But more importantly, waking them up to feed them at this point disrupts the natural process of them gradually extending that first stretch of sleep at the beginning of the night.
If she wakes at 5 am, you can feed her or leave her if she isn’t upset. As you said, sometimes she just falls back to sleep, which is great. You will know if she needs you because she will start to call out pretty consistently. Just remember that for babies, waking up between 6 – 7 am to start the day is very normal.
Regarding daylight savings, what you do really depends on your family routine and what works for you. If you would prefer Helen wakes at 7 am and goes to bed at 8 pm, then in the week leading up to the clocks changing, you need to gradually shift her circadian rhythm an hour earlier.
To do that, you need to do three things.
1. In the week before the time change, shift Helen’s entire schedule 15 minutes earlier every second day.
This will ensure that she will follow her typical schedule when the time change occurs.
This is how you do it:
- On Monday and Tuesday move Helen’s wake-up time, feeds, and sleep periods (naps and bedtime) 15 minutes earlier than usual. For example, if Helen usually wakes-up at 7 am, naps at 9:00 am, 1:00 pm and 5 pm, and then goes to bed at 8:00 pm. On Monday and Tuesday of that week, you will wake Helen up at 6:45 am, offer her first nap 8:45 am, her second nap at 12:45 pm, her third nap at 4:45 pm and bedtime at 7:45 pm.
- On Wednesday and Thursday mornings, you will wake Helen up 15 minutes earlier than you did on Tuesday and offer all feeds and sleep periods 15 earlier. For example, you will now wake Helen up at 6.30 am, and then offer her first nap 8:30 am, her second nap at 12:30 pm, her third nap at 4:30 pm and bedtime at 7:30 pm.
- On Friday and Saturday mornings, wake Helen up 15 minutes earlier than you did on Thursday morning and offer all feeds and sleep periods 15 minutes earlier. For example, you will now wake Helen at 6.15 am and then offer her first nap at 8:15 am, her second nap at 12:15 pm, her third nap at 4:15 pm, and bedtime at 7:15 pm.
- On Sunday morning, you will once again shift her wake-up time, feeds, and sleep periods 15 minutes earlier than the day before. However, because on Sunday morning the clock has moved forward an hour, what was previously 6 am is now 7 am. So you will wake Helen up at 7 am, she will have her first nap at 9 am, her second nap at 1 pm, her third nap at 5 pm, and her bedtime will be at 8 pm.
2. Dim the Lights an Hour Before Bedtime: Bright lights can keep Helen awake longer, which isn’t what you’re aiming for. You’re trying to get her to go to bed earlier, not later. So, make sure to close the curtains and use softer lighting options, like dim lights, small lamps, or nightlights, as you prepare her for bedtime.
3. Bright Lights in the Morning: When it’s time to wake up, make the room bright. Open the blinds and turn on the lights. This exposure to light in the morning will help reset Helen’s internal clock to wake up earlier, which also helps her get to bed earlier.
If you do these three things in the week before the clocks move forward an hour, you will be able to successfully shift Helen’s internal body clock. However, it is important to note that a child’s circadian rhythm needs some time to adjust, so it might take Helen a week to adjust to the new schedule.
Regarding your question about wake windows, the length of time Helen can stay awake after a nap depends on the quality and length of her previous nap. If she had a long nap, you may notice she has a longer wake window – so she might stay awake for 2 1/2 hours. But if she has a short nap, she might only be able to stay awake for 2 hours or slightly less. It’s due to this variability in wake windows, I recommend you look at wake windows as one piece of a three-piece puzzle when determining when Helen is tired. The other pieces are her general pattern (wake, feed, play, sleep) and, lastly, her unique tired signs.
I hope that helps!
Emma