[Emma H]

Hi Mary,

Congratulations on the arrival of your little one! Please don’t feel as though you’re “doing something wrong” or creating unbreakable habits at this stage. At around 7 weeks, babies often start staying awake longer during the day, making transfers from arms to cot a bit more challenging than they were in the early newborn days. She’s also around the peak of the Period of PURPLE Crying, which can bring extra fussiness and make settling tougher, especially in the late afternoons and evenings.

In order to give you the best possible advice, would you mind sharing a few details about your current routine?

• Does she have a consistent wake time in the morning? If so, what time?
• Have you started implementing a wake–feed–play–sleep routine?
• About how long does she typically stay awake between naps?
• Does she use a pacifier?
• Are you swaddling her for naps? If so, what type of swaddle are you using?
• What is her sleeping environment like? (e.g., lighting, noise level, temperature)
• How do you usually settle her to sleep for naps and bedtime?
• Do you have a nap time routine?
• How many naps does she take each day, and roughly when do they start?

I know that’s a lot of questions, but these details will help me tailor my suggestions to fit your little one’s needs.

Looking forward to hearing from you,

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Stephanie,

I’m so glad you’re finding the live example videos helpful!

That’s a great idea to add a basic outline of the daily schedule under the videos to make it easier to follow along. I’ll look into adding that soon.

Sample Routine for a 3-Month-Old with 4 Naps

A typical schedule could look like this:

• 7:30 AM – Wake up & feed
• 9:00 – 9:45 AM – Nap 1
• 9:45 AM – Feed & play
• 11:30 – 12:15 PM – Nap 2
• 12:15 PM – Feed & play
• 2:15 – 3:00 PM – Nap 3
• 3:00 PM – Feed & play
• 4:45 – 5:30 PM – Nap 4
• 7:00 / 7:30 PM – Bedtime

This is just an example—usually, when babies are taking four naps a day, one nap tends to be a little longer than 45 minutes. If all naps are around 45 minutes, they may still need a fifth nap to get through the day.

Feeding After Short Naps

In general, I recommend offering a feed after each nap, even if it was a short one. If your baby isn’t interested, that’s completely fine—just continue on with your routine. What you should notice is as they get older and their wake windows extend, the time between feeds will naturally start to space out.

Managing Long Carrier Naps

It’s common for babies to sleep longer in a carrier because we naturally move around, pat or shush them as soon as they start to stir and this helps them connect sleep cycles.

But since we want to encourage longer stretches of sleep at night, I recommend waking them after 2 hours to:

• Ensure they don’t meet all their sleep needs during the day.
• Help them get most of their daily milk intake during the daytime rather than overnight.

Handling a Grumpy Wake-Up from a Short Nap

If your baby wakes up grumpy from a short nap, here’s what can help:

• Offer comfort first – A cuddle and a feed can help them reset.
• Shorten the next wake window – Sleep pressure builds faster after a short nap, so they may need less awake time before their next sleep.
• Use distraction – A change of scenery, going outside, or moving to another room can help shift their mood.

I hope this helps,
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Stephanie,

First of all, congratulations on the safe arrival of your little one!

Life with a newborn and a toddler must be incredibly busy, and I completely understand why using the settling pyramid for naps would be challenging with a toddler running around. You’re already doing a great job by establishing a bedtime routine!

Bedtimes under three months can be unpredictable and often quite late, but it sounds like your little one is already falling asleep at a great time, which is fantastic.

Helping Bedtime Become More Consistent

You’ve already implemented a consistent wake-up time, which is key in helping his circadian rhythm mature. Over time, this will help bedtime naturally settle into a predictable window (give or take 30 minutes).

One thing you could try is narrowing his morning wake-up range so it falls within the same 30-minute window each day—e.g., 7:30-8:00 AM. This small adjustment can help his first nap become more predictable, which in turn helps all subsequent naps and bedtime fall into a more regular pattern.

Another way to encourage a consistent bedtime is by continuing to cap his final nap of the day, ensuring he’s ready to sleep at the same time each evening.

That said, at just eight weeks old, he’s in the peak of the Period of Purple Crying, so some bedtime unpredictability is completely normal.

Using the Settling Pyramid

In regards to trying to use the settling pyramid there are a few options.

Option 1: Using the Settling Pyramid Downstairs

You could start by using the settling pyramid downstairs, allowing him to fall asleep in his bassinet before transferring him upstairs to his bed once he’s in deep sleep. The goal at this stage is simply to help him get used to falling asleep outside of your arms and without movement.

Since he already transitions well from your arms to his bed without waking, this method shouldn’t cause confusion.

If you choose this option, I recommend slightly extending his bedtime routine to create a smoother transition:

1. Bottle feed
2. Dim the lights in the living room (or turn them off if possible)
3. Swaddle or use a sleep sack
4. Offer a pacifier (if using one)
5. Walk around the room while singing a lullaby
6. Once calm but still awake, lay him in the bassinet and use the settling pyramid

If he fusses and needs to be picked up, you can soothe him in your arms and then attempt the settling pyramid again. However, if you’re exhausted, it’s completely fine to settle him to sleep in your arms. Just make a note of the time he falls into deep sleep without waking—this can help you identify any natural sleep patterns and adjust bedtime accordingly if needed.

Pacifier Tip

If you notice he frequently wakes when the pacifier falls out, it may not be helping him self-settle. In this case, try using it only to calm him. Then, just before he falls asleep, gently place your finger between the pacifier and the corner of his mouth to break the seal and remove it. This way, he completes the final step of falling asleep without relying on it.

Option 2: Gradually Reducing Movement While Settling in Your Arms

If transitioning to the settling pyramid feels like too big of a change right now, you can continue settling him in your arms while slowly reducing movement.

Here’s how this could look:

1. Bottle feed
2. Dim the lights in the living room (or turn them off if possible)
3. Swaddle or use a sleep sack
4. Offer a pacifier (if using one)
5. Walk around while singing a lullaby and patting his bottom
6. Stop walking, but continue patting and shushing
7. Stop patting, but continue shushing
8. Stop shushing and allow him to drift off naturally

By gradually reducing movement in stages, you’re helping him adjust to falling asleep with less external support. Over time, this will make it much easier to introduce the settling pyramid when you’re ready and bedtime becomes more predictable.

Option 3: Using the Settling Pyramid in His Bedroom

Another approach to consider is settling him to sleep directly in his bedroom.

Since deep sleep dominates the first half of the night, your toddler is unlikely to wake when you settle your baby in the crib next door. However, if your toddler is a light sleeper, this option may not be ideal right now, and that’s completely okay.

If you decide to give it a try, you can complete most of the bedtime routine downstairs and then move upstairs while singing the lullaby. Once in his bedroom, gently lay him in the crib and use the settling pyramid to help him drift off to sleep.

Naps and the Settling Pyramid

When it comes to naps, trying the settling pyramid for just 20 minutes at a time can be a good approach (since it can take that long for babies to fall asleep). If you’re going to attempt this, the first nap of the day is usually the easiest.

That said, with a toddler in the house, using a baby carrier for naps is completely fine if that’s what works best right now. The key is keeping a consistent wake-up time and following a wake, feed, play, sleep routine whenever possible. As separating the feed from sleep like this will gradually help your baby learn to fall asleep without needing to feed to sleep.

For now, focusing on using the settling pyramid at bedtime is a great first step.

As he gets older, you can gradually apply the same approach to naps.

Does this sound okay?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Maria,

Thanks for sharing so much detail about your little one’s sleep. It sounds like you’re doing a great job tuning into her needs and creating a responsive routine.

Unfortunately at this age, there isn’t a set sleep schedule because sleep is largely driven by sleep pressure, which is influenced by factors like how long and restful the previous nap was, what activities she was engaged in during her wake periods, and a few other variables. The best approach right now is to combine your knowledge of her unique cues with age-appropriate wake windows and the general patterns that tend to emerge. In the module titled How to Read Your Baby’s Cues to Know Exactly When It’s Sleep Time, I walk you through this process step by step. Have you had a chance to watch this module?

One thing I will say is that at 7 weeks, you may notice that she doesn’t always follow the wake-feed-play-sleep cycle during the daytime. She might just wake up, feed, and then fall straight back to sleep. This is completely normal at this age. Over the coming weeks, you’ll likely see her gradually having more awake time after feeds, and that’s when you can start following the wake-feed-play-sleep routine more consistently during the day.

Although there’s no fixed nap schedule at this stage, you can encourage a more predictable rhythm by waking her at the same time each morning (within about a 30-minute window). Doing this helps reset her still-developing circadian rhythm, making that first nap of the day more consistent. Over time, as the first nap falls into place, the rest of the day’s naps will start to follow a more regular pattern as well.

Another benefit of a consistent morning wake time is that it supports the maturation of her circadian rhythm, which in turn helps bedtime become more predictable and encourages longer stretches of sleep overnight.

You mentioned that you’re not yet following a nap routine and that you’re currently helping her fall asleep in your arms as you walk around. Although it may seem like a small change, introducing a simple nap routine now can help make it easier to transition her to falling asleep in the crib over time. Would you be happy to tweak the way you’re currently helping her fall asleep slightly when you’re at home? A routine like this could help:

• Wrap her in her swaddle.
• Walk into your bedroom, dim the lights, and turn on the white noise machine.
• Hold her in your arms while gently walking around and singing a lullaby or song.
• Once the lullaby ends, continue holding her while walking, but add gentle bottom pats and shushing.
• As she starts to calm, gradually reduce your movements:
  • Stop walking and just continue patting and shushing.
  • Then stop patting while continuing to shush.
  • Finally, stop shushing—all before she falls asleep.




By gradually reducing the amount of movement and input she relies on to fall asleep, you’ll be helping her learn to settle more independently. This approach not only makes the transition to the settling pyramid smoother when you’re ready but can also make it easier to transfer her to the crib if she falls asleep in your arms.

If you feel ready to try the settling pyramid now, you can take the next step by placing her in the crib right after finishing the lullaby, rather than continuing to hold her.

Does this sound possible?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Yana,

Thank you for sharing all these details—I can see how much thought you’re putting into understanding your baby’s cues and making sleep as smooth as possible.

You’re doing a fantastic job observing patterns and adjusting based on what you see.

Let’s break everything down and see how we can fine-tune things.

1. Why Does He Fall Asleep Easily in Motion but Protest at Home?

It makes perfect sense that he falls asleep so easily while in motion (like in your arms at the mall). The combination of gentle movement, a snug and secure feeling, and a new but not overstimulating environment naturally lulls him to sleep—much like how adults often doze off on a moving train.

At home, however, sleep is more intentional, and he’s more aware of the transition. This can lead to:

• Protest crying – He wants to keep engaging and isn’t quite ready to wind down.
• A need to release tension before sleep – Some babies fuss as a way to let off steam before they’re able to fully relax, which explains why he may cry for a bit but then fall asleep within minutes.

Neither of these reactions necessarily means you’re missing his cues or that he’s overstimulated—it may just be his way of processing the shift to sleep.

2. Why Does He Sometimes Cry Before Sleep?

It sounds like his crying before sleep happens in two different ways:

1. He seems happy and alert, but cries once you start the sleep process and then takes a while to settle to sleep.

   • This may indicate that his wake window could be stretched slightly (by 5-10 minutes) to make him more naturally ready for sleep. At 14 weeks, they can start to stay awake for 1 and 1/2 hours at a time.

2. He fusses at first, then quickly falls asleep after a few minutes of crying.

   • This suggests that he’s actually ready for sleep, but crying is his way of winding down. Some babies need to release a bit of tension before sleep, even when they’re not overtired.

3. Pre-Sleep Relaxation Techniques to Try

If you suspect he needs a smoother transition from wake time to sleep, try adding a short wind-down period before starting the sleep routine.

Here are a few things to experiment with:

• Step outside or look out a window together for a couple of minutes before the sleep routine.
• Or try reducing the stimulation before sleep by dimming the lights, speaking softly, or using gentle movements about 10-15 minutes before putting him down.
• Hold him still in your arms for a few minutes before rocking or swaddling, letting him relax before transitioning to sleep.
• Sing a lullaby or hum rhythmically before starting the actual sleep process.

You could try one of these at a time to see if it makes a difference.

4. Adjusting Wake Windows & Activity Distribution

You mentioned his first nap happened after 1 hour and 3 minutes of awake time. That’s within a typical range for his age, but if he’s crying as soon as you start putting him to sleep, it could indicate that:

• He may need a slightly longer wake window—try extending it to 1 hour 10–15 minutes and see if he settles more easily.
• If he continues to protest when you begin the nap routine and takes a while to fall asleep, gradually extend his wake window up to 1 hour 30 minutes to see if that helps.

One useful strategy is to track the time he wakes up, the time he actually falls into deep sleep, and the length of his nap. This can help you identify patterns in how long he comfortably stays awake before becoming overtired or struggling to settle. Adjusting wake windows based on this data can make naps smoother over time.

In terms of wake window activities, what you’re doing sounds great! You might try:
– Structuring wake time so the most stimulating activities happen earlier (like tummy time and playmat) and calmer activities happen later (cuddling, looking out a window, a slow-paced book).

5. Why Has His Nighttime Sleep Changed?

Since you mentioned he is actually feeding longer during night wakings, it suggests:

• Genuine hunger rather than habit-based waking (so he may be going through a growth spurt or just needing extra calories overnight).

What You Can Do:

1. Make sure he’s getting full daytime feeds – To help him take in more during the day, try feeding in a bright, stimulating environment to keep him engaged. If you notice he’s sucking but not swallowing as frequently, it’s a sign he may be dozing off (which is completely normal).

   When this happens, gently break the seal and try changing his diaper or switching breasts to wake him up and encourage him to feed for longer.

   These small adjustments can help ensure he gets a fuller feed, which may also support longer sleep stretches at night.

2. Keep wake-up time and bedtime consistent – The more predictable bedtime is, the more likely his body will return to longer stretches naturally.
3. Wait before intervening overnight – If he wakes but isn’t crying intensely, give him a few minutes to see if he’ll resettle before immediately feeding.

6. Is Feeding Every 2 Hours Normal at 14 Weeks?

Yes! While some babies stretch to 3-hour feeds, many still eat every 2–2.5 hours, especially if they are breastfed. Breast milk digests quickly, and hunger can fluctuate during growth spurts. If he’s truly eating when offered (not just comfort sucking), then his feeding schedule is completely fine.

I hope this helps!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Emily,

I’m so sorry again for the delay in responding. For some reason, I didn’t receive a notification for your message on the 8th—only the one you sent today.

To ensure I don’t miss any future messages, would you mind replying directly to this message and see if that fixes the problem? I’ll also make sure to check it more regularly to avoid missing any of your replies.

Sleep & Feeding Observations

I completely understand why you’d be concerned about whether he’s getting enough sleep. However, it’s very likely that he’s sleeping quite a bit while feeding. At this age, we wouldn’t typically expect babies to feed for a full 60 minutes, so it’s possible he’s dozing off during those sessions.

Another key way to gauge whether he’s getting enough sleep is by observing his mood when he’s awake. If he’s generally content—aside from occasional gas discomfort—he’s likely getting sufficient sleep, even if it’s in shorter stretches. However, if he’s frequently inconsolable during wake times, it may be a sign that he needs more rest.

Also I did just want to mention that since he’s feeding for such long periods, it makes sense that he doesn’t have much wake time for play and books. What should happen is as he gets older and more efficient at feeding, the time required to feed should reduce and he will have more time to play.

Suggestions for Encouraging Crib Naps

1. Maintain a consistent morning wake-up time.

   • His wake-up time may be shifting earlier, which is normal at this stage. Try to keep it within a 30-minute window to help regulate his bedtime, encourage longer nighttime stretches, and eventually establish a more predictable nap schedule.

2. Encourage fuller feeds to reduce drowsy feeding.

   • When he wakes from a nap, let him play for 5–10 minutes to fully wake up (as long as he’s not crying from hunger).
   • Feed him in a bright, engaging environment to keep him alert. If he starts getting sleepy (e.g., sucking without swallowing), pause the feed, change his diaper, or switch positions to wake him up before resuming.

3. Watch for true tired cues.

   • After feeding, if he’s still awake, engage in a brief play session and watch for tired signs.
   • If you see early cues, try changing the activity or moving to a new room to rule out boredom (boredom cues can look similar to tired cues). If he continues fussing, he’s likely ready for sleep.

4. Adjust the nap routine slightly.

   • Before nap time, follow this sequence:
     1. Offer the pacifier.
     2. Swaddle him.
     3. Walk around the living room a couple of times to help him settle.
     4. Bring him to the bedroom, close the curtains, and turn on white noise.
     5. Hold and rock him gently while singing a lullaby.
     6. Lay him down in the crib and use the settling pyramid to help him fall asleep.
     7. Just before he drifts off, slide your finger between his mouth and the pacifier to break the seal and remove it. Since you mentioned he wakes when the pacifier falls out, removing it just before sleep may help lengthen naps. If he stirs, leave it in for now and try again later.

5. If he needs help settling to sleep, try minimising movement as he drifts off.

   • If he gets upset and needs to be held or rocked to fall asleep, start by rocking him gently, then gradually slow the movement until he drifts off while you’re standing still. Helping him learn to fall asleep without constant motion will make it easier to transition to the settling pyramid as he is ready.

6. Start small—focus on the first nap and bedtime.

   • Implementing these changes for every nap can be exhausting. Instead, try using this approach for just the first nap of the day and at bedtime.
   • The first nap is usually the easiest for babies to settle into, and at bedtime, their circadian rhythm and sleep pressure work together to naturally support sleep.

I have also answered your questions below:
1. Should you wake him up for “playtime” if he falls asleep while feeding?

Since his feeds are quite long, it’s not surprising that he dozes off—they often last as long as a typical wake window.

To reduce the chances of him falling asleep while feeding, try offering feeds in a bright, stimulating environment with plenty of distractions. You can also break the seal and pause the feed if you notice he’s sucking without swallowing, as this usually signals he’s about to drift off.

However, if he does fall asleep while feeding, it’s perfectly fine to let him sleep. As he gets older and becomes more alert, he’ll naturally spend more time awake after feeds. Right now, falling asleep at the breast isn’t a “bad habit”—it’s completely normal and something you can gradually adjust later if needed.

2. Earlier bedtime as he approaches 3 months?

Between 3 and 4 months, bedtime naturally starts to move earlier, and by 4 months, it often settles into a predictable time within a 30-minute window. It sounds like his bedtime is already fairly consistent, which is great!

If you’d like, you can gradually shift his bedtime earlier by 15 minutes every three nights and observe how he responds. If this leads to better nighttime sleep, you can stick with the earlier time. However, if he starts waking up frequently in the early part of the night before settling into deep sleep, it may be a sign that he’s not quite ready for the adjustment yet.

3. When he wakes after 25 minutes, how long should you wait before starting the “pyramid” (or another soothing method)?

If he’s only fussing lightly—moving around or crying out with pauses in between—give him a minute or two to see if he can settle himself back to sleep. However, if his fussing escalates into a full-blown cry with no breaks, it’s best to intervene sooner rather than later.

4. If he wakes up after 25 minutes, how do you know if he’s done napping or still needs more sleep?

Unfortunately, sleep pressure—the drive that helps babies fall and stay asleep for naps—naturally dissipates during sleep. This means that even after a short nap, he may no longer feel tired enough to fall back asleep.

When he wakes after a 25-minute nap, you can try settling him back to sleep. If he doesn’t fall asleep within 15 minutes, it’s best to get him up and start the next wake window.

Keep in mind that if his nap was short, he may become tired again sooner than usual, and he’ll likely need more naps throughout the day to make up for it.

Questions About Overnight Feeds & Wakings

You mentioned that he’s now fully waking after night feeds. I just have a few questions to help me understand what’s going on:

• Is he still waking every hour throughout the night?
• Are you still settling him to sleep in the crib from 9:30 PM to 1 AM, then feeding him at 1 AM, 4 AM, and 6 AM?
• When you feed him overnight, do you keep him swaddled and then lay him straight back in the crib? Or do you unswaddle him, feed him, hold him upright for burping, then re-swaddle before laying him back down?
• When you say he stays awake after a feed, does that mean:
  • He remains awake for the entire feed and then stays awake, requiring you to rock him in your arms to get him back to sleep?
  • Or do you continue feeding him until he falls asleep, then wait until he’s in deep sleep before transferring him to the crib?
• When he wakes during the night, what are you doing to help him fall back asleep?
• Are his overnight wakes happening at very predictable times (e.g., every x minutes or hours, almost on the dot)? If so, it’s likely he’s waking between sleep cycles and needing something to help him fall back asleep.
• Or are his wake-ups more random, without a clear pattern? If so, that could suggest discomfort or pain rather than a habitual sleep cycle wake-up.

Does these suggestions sound doable?

Emma

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  Emma H.

[Emma H]

Hi Emily,

I’m so sorry again for the delay in responding. For some reason, I didn’t receive a notification for your message on the 8th—only the one you sent today.

To ensure I don’t miss any future messages, would you mind replying directly to this message and see if that fixes the problem? I’ll also make sure to check it more regularly to avoid missing any of your replies.

Sleep & Feeding Observations

I completely understand why you’d be concerned about whether he’s getting enough sleep. However, it’s very likely that he’s sleeping quite a bit while feeding. At this age, we wouldn’t typically expect babies to feed for a full 60 minutes, so it’s possible he’s dozing off during those sessions.

Another key way to gauge whether he’s getting enough sleep is by observing his mood when he’s awake. If he’s generally content—aside from occasional gas discomfort—he’s likely getting sufficient sleep, even if it’s in shorter stretches. However, if he’s frequently inconsolable during wake times, it may be a sign that he needs more rest.

Also I did just want to mention that since he’s feeding for such long periods, it makes sense that he doesn’t have much wake time for play and books. What should happen is as he gets older and more efficient at feeding, the time required to feed should reduce and he will have more time to play.

Suggestions for Encouraging Crib Naps

1. Maintain a consistent morning wake-up time.

   • His wake-up time may be shifting earlier, which is normal at this stage. Try to keep it within a 30-minute window to help regulate his bedtime, encourage longer nighttime stretches, and eventually establish a more predictable nap schedule.

2. Encourage fuller feeds to reduce drowsy feeding.

   • When he wakes from a nap, let him play for 5–10 minutes to fully wake up (as long as he’s not crying from hunger).
   • Feed him in a bright, engaging environment to keep him alert. If he starts getting sleepy (e.g., sucking without swallowing), pause the feed, change his diaper, or switch positions to wake him up before resuming.

3. Watch for true tired cues.

   • After feeding, if he’s still awake, engage in a brief play session and watch for tired signs.
   • If you see early cues, try changing the activity or moving to a new room to rule out boredom (boredom cues can look similar to tired cues). If he continues fussing, he’s likely ready for sleep.

4. Adjust the nap routine slightly.

   • Before nap time, follow this sequence:
     1. Offer the pacifier.
     2. Swaddle him.
     3. Walk around the living room a couple of times to help him settle.
     4. Bring him to the bedroom, close the curtains, and turn on white noise.
     5. Hold and rock him gently while singing a lullaby.
     6. Lay him down in the crib and use the settling pyramid to help him fall asleep.
     7. Just before he drifts off, slide your finger between his mouth and the pacifier to break the seal and remove it. Since you mentioned he wakes when the pacifier falls out, removing it just before sleep may help lengthen naps. If he stirs, leave it in for now and try again later.

5. If he needs help settling to sleep, try minimising movement as he drifts off.

   • If he gets upset and needs to be held or rocked to fall asleep, start by rocking him gently, then gradually slow the movement until he drifts off while you’re standing still. Helping him learn to fall asleep without constant motion will make it easier to transition to the settling pyramid as he is ready.

6. Start small—focus on the first nap and bedtime.

   • Implementing these changes for every nap can be exhausting. Instead, try using this approach for just the first nap of the day and at bedtime.
   • The first nap is usually the easiest for babies to settle into, and at bedtime, their circadian rhythm and sleep pressure work together to naturally support sleep.

I have also answered your questions below:
1. Should you wake him up for “playtime” if he falls asleep while feeding?

Since his feeds are quite long, it’s not surprising that he dozes off—they often last as long as a typical wake window.

To reduce the chances of him falling asleep while feeding, try offering feeds in a bright, stimulating environment with plenty of distractions. You can also break the seal and pause the feed if you notice he’s sucking without swallowing, as this usually signals he’s about to drift off.

However, if he does fall asleep while feeding, it’s perfectly fine to let him sleep. As he gets older and becomes more alert, he’ll naturally spend more time awake after feeds. Right now, falling asleep at the breast isn’t a “bad habit”—it’s completely normal and something you can gradually adjust later if needed.

2. Earlier bedtime as he approaches 3 months?

Between 3 and 4 months, bedtime naturally starts to move earlier, and by 4 months, it often settles into a predictable time within a 30-minute window. It sounds like his bedtime is already fairly consistent, which is great!

If you’d like, you can gradually shift his bedtime earlier by 15 minutes every three nights and observe how he responds. If this leads to better nighttime sleep, you can stick with the earlier time. However, if he starts waking up frequently in the early part of the night before settling into deep sleep, it may be a sign that he’s not quite ready for the adjustment yet.

3. When he wakes after 25 minutes, how long should you wait before starting the “pyramid” (or another soothing method)?

If he’s only fussing lightly—moving around or crying out with pauses in between—give him a minute or two to see if he can settle himself back to sleep. However, if his fussing escalates into a full-blown cry with no breaks, it’s best to intervene sooner rather than later.

4. If he wakes up after 25 minutes, how do you know if he’s done napping or still needs more sleep?

Unfortunately, sleep pressure—the drive that helps babies fall and stay asleep for naps—naturally dissipates during sleep. This means that even after a short nap, he may no longer feel tired enough to fall back asleep.

When he wakes after a 25-minute nap, you can try settling him back to sleep. If he doesn’t fall asleep within 15 minutes, it’s best to get him up and start the next wake window.

Keep in mind that if his nap was short, he may become tired again sooner than usual, and he’ll likely need more naps throughout the day to make up for it.

Questions About Overnight Feeds & Wakings

You mentioned that he’s now fully waking after night feeds. I just have a few questions to help me understand what’s going on:

• Is he still waking every hour throughout the night?
• Are you still settling him to sleep in the crib from 9:30 PM to 1 AM, then feeding him at 1 AM, 4 AM, and 6 AM?
• When you feed him overnight, do you keep him swaddled and then lay him straight back in the crib? Or do you unswaddle him, feed him, hold him upright for burping, then re-swaddle before laying him back down?
• When you say he stays awake after a feed, does that mean:
  • He remains awake for the entire feed and then stays awake, requiring you to rock him in your arms to get him back to sleep?
  • Or do you continue feeding him until he falls asleep, then wait until he’s in deep sleep before transferring him to the crib?
• When he wakes during the night, what are you doing to help him fall back asleep?
• Are his overnight wakes happening at very predictable times (e.g., every x minutes or hours, almost on the dot)? If so, it’s likely he’s waking between sleep cycles and needing something to help him fall back asleep.
• Or are his wake-ups more random, without a clear pattern? If so, that could suggest discomfort or pain rather than a habitual sleep cycle wake-up.

Does these suggestions sound doable?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Rita,

No worries at all. Enjoy the rolling practice! And hopefully sleep settles down again soon.

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Rita,

You’re absolutely right—this sounds developmental rather than teething or belly issues.

The big clue is that she’s suddenly rolling from back to belly. This is a huge milestone, and with it often comes a temporary disruption in sleep. It’s very common for babies to have a few rough nights while their brain is busy processing a new skill.

Helping Her Through This Phase Faster

To help her adjust and move through this phase as quickly as possible, here are a few things you can do:

1. Lots of Rolling Practice During the Day

Encourage her to practice rolling both ways (back-to-belly and belly-to-back) as much as possible while she’s awake. The more confident she becomes, the less likely she’ll wake up feeling stuck at night.

2. Let Her Sleep on Her Belly (If She Rolls There on Her Own)

Many babies prefer sleeping on their belly once they learn to roll, and there’s no way to keep them on their back once they can roll independently. The recommendation is to always place her on her back to sleep, but if she rolls onto her belly, it’s okay to let her find a comfortable position. You can help her settle in this position by gently patting or shushing. Just ensure her crib is clear of loose items (toys, blankets, etc.).

3. Stick to Your Usual Sleep Cues

Even though bedtime is trickier right now, try to keep her routine consistent—same wind-down, same cues. This prevents her from forming new habits that could linger beyond this phase.

4. Switch to a Sleeping Bag with Arms Free (If You Haven’t Already)

If she’s still in a swaddle or sleep sack with her arms in, now is the time to transition to one that allows full arm movement. This gives her the freedom to adjust her position safely.

How Long Will This Last?

This phase typically resolves within 1-2 weeks as she masters rolling and adjusts to her new sleep position. Hang in there—you’re doing great! 💛

Emma

[Emma H]

Hey Stephanie,

Do you mean that if they’re 3 months of age and they are only napping 4 times instead of 5, or 3 times instead of 4 then they would have one less feed?

I guess you’re right in that they would have one less feed but if they are doing 4 naps instead of 5 or 3 instead of 4. But what tends to happen is they automatically space out their feeds, because they’re having a bigger feed when they do feed and they’re napping for longer stretches in the day (which is why they can only fit 4 naps in, instead of 5 or 3 instead or 4).

As they get older, it’s expected that they’ll start stretching the time between feeds.

The other thing that tends to happen is that they end up getting 2 feeds in that last wake window before bedtime. Because they get a feed when they wake from the nap and then they get offered another feed as part of the bedtime routine.

Does that make sense?

Emma

[Emma H]

No worries at all Stephanie!

He does seem to be doing really well for his age!

Let me know how it goes!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Yana,

Thank you so much for sharing this additional information!

It sounds like you’re doing an incredible job keeping your little one entertained while maintaining a quiet environment for your husband to work—no small feat!

It’s fantastic to hear that your baby is generally content for 30-50 minutes after waking from a nap. This is a strong sign that he’s likely not in pain or discomfort, which helps narrow down why he might be getting upset.

I’m also glad to hear he’s gaining weight nicely. You mentioned expressing a bit of milk when your breasts are overly full, and you’re wondering if this might be causing him to get hungry sooner than every two hours. One thing you could try is holding off on pumping before his feed. Instead, during the feed that follows his nap, let him nurse until he seems sleepy or pulls off. Then, change his diaper (to make him more alert) and offer the breast again. This little break and second attempt can sometimes encourage a fuller feed, which might help him go longer between feeds.

Regarding his cues, it truly sounds like you’re responding beautifully to his signals. Unfortunately, babies three months and under can switch from content to very distressed with little warning, and their temperament also plays a big role. The good news is that at around four months, you’ll likely find his cries become more predictable and he won’t escalate to distress quite so quickly.

On those occasions when he cries loudly and then immediately falls asleep, my advice is to go with the flow. You can lay him down in his crib or hold him for that nap—whatever feels right in the moment. Then, simply try to reintroduce your usual nap routine the next time.

For bedtime, it makes perfect sense to follow his lead based on his last nap. Since he’s sleeping well regardless of whether bedtime is at 6:30 or 8 p.m., continuing this approach is a good idea. By around four months of age, you should see his bedtime naturally settle into a more consistent window, usually within about 30 minutes. Many families find that a bedtime between 7 and 8 p.m. works well for their baby at this age.

To help bedtime become more predictable, continue to wake him at the same time each morning and try to aim for his first nap to happen at a consistent time as well. Once that first nap becomes fixed, you’ll often find the rest of the day’s naps start to follow suit and bedtime becomes more predictable.

When it comes to early signs of rolling over, here are a few things to look for:

• Rolling onto his side.
• Bringing his legs up towards his chest.
• Lifting his hips off the ground.

If he isn’t showing these signs yet then you can use the swaddle.

Please let me know if the Halo Sleep Sack or swaddling him with his arms down helps.

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Camilla,

It’s great to hear that you revisited the Period of PURPLE Crying video! I hope you found some new tips to try with your little one.

Based on what you’ve described, it sounds like your baby’s panicked breathing and crying during the fussy afternoon period—especially with no wet or soiled nappy and cluster feeding afterwards—may just be part of her natural fussy phase.

Preparing for Overseas Travel

When it comes to travelling overseas, there are a few things you can do both now and during the trip to make the experience smoother for your baby.

Things to Work On Now:

1. Establish a Consistent Wake-Up Time: Aim for the same 30-minute window each morning to help regulate her internal clock.

2. Create a Bedtime and Nap Routine: A consistent routine will cue your baby’s brain for sleep, making it easier to replicate this routine when you’re overseas.

3. Follow the Wake-Feed-Play-Sleep Cycle: During the day, use the wake-feed-play-sleep routine, and at night, follow the wake-feed-sleep routine. Keep lights low or off during nighttime wakes to reinforce the difference between day and night.

The goal is to make these routines familiar so you can use them to help your baby adjust to the new time zone.

Before the Flight:

1. Simplify Your Sleep Routine for the Plane: Create a mini version of your nap/bedtime routine that you can replicate in a limited space. For example:
   • Put her in her sleeping bag.
   • Sing a lullaby while gently rocking her in your arms (standing still, as walking around the plane might not always be an option).
   • Lay her down and use the settling pyramid technique to help her fall asleep.

When You Arrive in Singapore and London:

1. Start the Day Between 6:00 and 8:00 am Local Time: This helps maximise sunlight exposure and set your baby’s internal clock. If she wakes before 6:00 am, keep lights dim to signal that it’s still nighttime. If she won’t go back to sleep, keep activities calm and low-stimulation.

2. Expose Her to Natural Light: Once she wakes, get her into natural sunlight as soon as possible. This will help adjust her circadian rhythm.

3. Manage Nap Lengths: Initially, she might want to sleep for long stretches during the day because of the time difference. However, avoid letting naps go over 2 hours to help her adjust to sleeping more overnight.

4. Time the Last Nap Carefully: Make sure her last nap ends with enough time for a full wake window before aiming for a 7:00-8:00 pm bedtime in the new time zone.

5. Stick to Your Usual Nap and Bedtime Routine: This will continue to signal to her that it’s time to sleep, even in a new environment.

6. Expect Nighttime Wakes: Jet lag might lead to wakeful periods at night. Keep lights dim, play quietly, and help her settle back to sleep as soon as she seems ready.

I hope that helps!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Yana,

From what you’ve mentioned, it sounds like he isn’t always fussy or upset throughout the day. Does that sound correct? If he’s unsettled even when he’s sleeping, though, it could suggest there might be something causing him discomfort.

Is he continuing to gain weight and staying on track with his growth curve?

It seems like he gets fussy when you enter the bedroom, which can sometimes happen if they start associating the bedroom with sleep time. One thing that might help is slightly changing the nap and bedtime routine so that most of it happens in the living room, with just the final part in the bedroom.

Would you be open to tweaking the routine a bit to see if it helps him cry less? Here’s what it could look like:

Nap Routine:

• Before nap time, turn off the bedroom light and switch on the white noise machine.
• Put his Love to Dream Swaddle on in the living room.
• Then walk into the bedroom, singing a lullaby.
• Once you’re in the room, continue singing and do a lap around the room.
• Stand still, keep singing, and gently pat his bottom.
• Gradually stop singing and continue patting his bottom.
• Finally, stop patting and let him fall asleep in your arms.

Bedtime Routine:

• Before getting him ready for bed, turn off the bedroom light and turn on the white noise machine.
• Change his diaper in the living room or a brighter room.
• Put on his Love to Dream Swaddle.
• Feed him in the living room or a bright room.
• Then walk into the bedroom, singing the lullaby.
• Once you’re in the room, continue singing and do a lap of the room.
• Stand still, singing, and patting his bottom.
• Gradually stop singing and keep patting his bottom.
• Finally, stop patting and let him fall asleep in your arms.

Once he gets familiar with this routine and starts falling asleep without movement, you can then transition to using the settling pyramid after you do a lap around the room singing the lullaby.

Also, you mentioned that he prefers to be held upright, so you might want to consider holding him in that position while you sing the lullaby and pace the room. That could help him feel more comfortable and calm.

It’s great to hear that he has a consistent wake-up time already. On the nights when he goes to bed at 6:30 pm, I would expect him to wake up around 6-6:30 am at the latest, as that’s a full 12 hours of sleep. On nights he goes to bed at 8 pm, a 7-7:30 am wake-up would be more typical.

I noticed that his bedtime seems to vary quite a bit—does it usually shift that much, or is it more commonly around 8 pm with occasional earlier bedtimes?

Also, I was wondering if you’ve tried using a swaddle sleeping bag where his arms are down by his sides? Swaddling can sometimes have an instant calming effect, so it might be worth trying if you have one on hand. However, if he’s showing early signs of learning to roll over, it’s best to skip this and start transitioning to a sleeping bag where his arms are free.

Does any of this sound doable?
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Yana,

Thanks so much for getting back to me and answering my questions!

I just need a little time to think through some options that might make sleep a bit easier for your little one. I will reach out tomorrow with some strategies for you to try.

Emma