[Emma H]

Hi Marien,

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with using the wake, play, feed, sleep routine if it’s working well for you and your baby. However, it’s helpful to be aware that if your little one only knows how to fall asleep through feeding, it can sometimes lead to more frequent wake-ups as her sleep patterns mature.

This sleep maturation usually happens between 3-5 months of age. As her sleep cycles develop, she’ll start to wake naturally between them. If feeding is her only way of settling back to sleep, she may call out for you each time she stirs, which can lead to her waking every 1-2 hours overnight.

That said, every baby is different. Some babies can feed to sleep and still have longer, more restful stretches overnight. It all comes down to your baby’s individual sleep needs and what feels right for both of you.

However, I did notice you mentioned that you’re a little concerned that your little one ends up sleeping in your arms.

If you’re hoping to gently transition away from that, I’d love to help you come up with a plan. To make sure I give you the best guidance, I just have a few questions:

1. From your previous posts, I calculated that your little one is around 8 weeks old. Is that correct?

2. Does she have a consistent wake time each day? If so, what time is it?

3. Can you walk me through what her nap sleep routine looks like from start to finish?

4. You mentioned you follow the wake, play, feed, sleep routine. Does this mean you feed her to sleep for all naps and at bedtime?

5. What does her bedtime routine currently look like?

6. When you say she ends up sleeping in your arms, are you able to lay her down in her crib or bassinet at all while she sleeps, or do you hold her for the entire nap?

7. Overnight, where does she sleep?

8. Does she use a pacifier?

9. Can you describe what her sleep environment is like in the bedroom? (e.g., darkness, noise level, temperature, white noise, etc.)

10. How many naps is she having per day, and how long do these naps usually last?

11. Lastly, what time does she usually go to bed?

If you happy with your little one sleeping in your arms, then please don’t worry about answering the questions.

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Robin,

Thank you so much for your kind words!

It sounds like you’re putting so much thought and care into helping your little one sleep well. You’re doing a fantastic job trying different strategies and observing what works for him.

Before I can give you the most helpful advice on transitioning him away from chest sleeping, I just have a few questions:

1. Does your little one have a consistent wake time each day? If so, what time is it?

2. Can you walk me through what his nap sleep routine looks like from start to finish?

3. Have you been able to implement the wake, feed, play, sleep routine during the day?

4. You mentioned you feed him to sleep at bedtime—how do you help him fall asleep at nap time? For example, do you baby-wear him, or do you sit on a lounge and pat him to sleep while you stay still?

5. What does his bedtime routine currently look like?

6. When you say you live in a one-bedroom, is the bedroom separate from the living room and kitchen, or is it all one big room?

7. When you say he sleeps on your chest at night, are you able to lay him down in his crib overnight, or do you hold him all night or co-sleep with him (so you can get some sleep)?

8. Does he use a pacifier?

9. Can you describe what his sleep environment is like in the bedroom? (e.g., darkness, noise level, temperature, white noise, etc.)

10. How many naps is he having per day and how long do these naps tend to be?

11. Lastly, what time does he usually go to bed?

I am sorry for all of the questions, but answering them will help me give you some really practical, tailored advice for gradually transitioning him away from chest sleeping.

Looking forward to hearing from you!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Stephanie,

I’m sorry you’re not feeling well at the moment. Hopefully, you feel better soon!

It’s so good to hear that you’ve made progress with helping your little one fall asleep independently at both bedtime and during the day—that’s a huge step forward!

From what you’ve described, it sounds like you’re already building a strong foundation for healthy sleep habits. At this age, sleep cycles typically range from 20 to 50 minutes, so while a 20-minute nap can feel discouraging (especially when he wakes cranky and unrested), it’s actually very common.

It seems that when he wakes from those short naps, his sleep pressure has already eased, which can make it much harder for him to resettle—even with the pacifier. Here are a few strategies to help encourage longer naps:

1. Pacifier Support

• Try re-inserting the pacifier: About 15 minutes into the nap, go into his room and gently pop the pacifier back in if it has fallen out. This way, when he stirs between sleep cycles, he already has the soothing tool he’s used to and might drift into the next cycle without fully waking.

• Use only during the nap routine: If re-inserting the pacifier mid-nap seems to disturb him, another option is to use it just as part of the settling routine. Pop it in at the beginning, then gently remove it just before he drifts off by sliding your finger between the pacifier and the corner of his mouth. This helps him learn to fall asleep without relying on sucking, which can support longer, more consolidated naps over time. This is already something that you are doing which is great!

• Consider phasing it out: If neither approach seems to help and you find that he consistently wakes as soon as the pacifier falls out, it may be a sign that he’s become dependent on it to fall (and stay) asleep. Since babies typically don’t develop the fine motor skills to replace the pacifier themselves until around 7 months, teaching him to fall asleep without it may improve his ability to link sleep cycles on his own.

2. Adjust Wake Windows

Try extending his wake windows by 10–15 minutes and keep that change consistent for a few days to see if slightly more sleep pressure helps him settle more deeply and nap longer. If that doesn’t help and you start noticing more resistance or overtired signs, try going the other way—shortening wake windows slightly—to see if that makes a difference.

3. Stick with Independent Sleep Practice

Naps naturally take longer to consolidate than night sleep, so what you’re experiencing is very normal at this stage. If he’s consistently taking short naps right now, the most helpful thing you can do is continue supporting him to fall asleep independently in the crib. That’s the key skill that will eventually allow him to link sleep cycles and take longer, more restorative naps on his own.

Does that sound okay?
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Aditi,

There could be a few reasons why bedtime is feeling a bit tricky right now:

1. Her sleep patterns may be maturing. Around this age, babies start to become more aware of their environment, including how they fall asleep. If she’s being rocked fully to sleep and then waking shortly after being placed in the bassinet, it could be because she’s noticing the change in environment—falling asleep in your arms but waking up somewhere different. This awareness can cause more resistance and frequent wake-ups.

2. She might not be quite ready for bed. If her body hasn’t built up enough sleep pressure, she may simply not be tired enough yet. This could explain why she’s taking a long time to fall asleep, is upset during the settling process, or wakes 5–10 minutes after being placed down.

To work out what’s going on and tailor some advice to suit your little one, I just have a few questions:

1. It sounds like she’s consistently waking between 7:00 and 7:30am—is that correct?
2. Have you been able to follow a wake–feed–play–sleep routine during the day?
3. Does she use a pacifier to fall asleep?
4. What does her nap routine look like—do you have any cues or wind-down rituals before naps?
5. What does her bedtime routine look like?
6. Are you rocking her to sleep for all her naps? And when you’re rocking her to sleep are you walking around or standing still?
7. Can you describe her sleep environment (e.g., is she in her own room or yours, is it cool, dark, and quiet)?
8. Where does she nap during the day?
9. How is her overnight sleep—does she wake for feeds, and if so, at what times?
10. Have you had a chance to try the settling pyramid with her?

One helpful thing to do over the next few days is to note down the time her final nap ends, and the time she finally falls into a deep sleep at bedtime (meaning she stays asleep and doesn’t wake soon after). This will help us identify if there’s a consistent pattern or give us clues about how long her final wake window needs to be.

I am sorry for all the questions.
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Aditi,

From what you’ve described, it does sound like she might benefit from a slightly longer wake window before that first nap.

It looks like you’re currently trying to settle her for her first nap around 8:00/8:10am. Given that she’s waking around 6:40am, I’d suggest trying to shift that first nap to around 8:30am and keeping it consistent for about three days to see how she responds.

Sometimes at this age, babies can manage a bit more awake time in the morning than we expect, especially if they seem happy and energetic during that window. Extending the wake window just a little may help her build up enough sleep pressure to settle more easily and fall asleep more quickly.

Let me know how you go.
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Robin,

It’s so exciting to hear that your little one is starting to accept the crib for naps—that’s a really big step forward!

How have things been going over the last few days?

And just to reassure you, those shorter naps are completely normal for a 3-month-old. At this age, most babies are still learning to consolidate their naps, so 30-minute stretches are totally expected.

To help him continue to get comfortable sleeping in his crib I just have a few suggestions:

Morning Wake-Up Adjustment

I love that you’re trying to be consistent with his wake-up time around 7:30am. To build on that progress, it might help to start the day by heading into the lounge room at 7:30am rather than waiting until 8:30am. When you do this, try to:

• Open the blinds, let in natural light, and turn on all the lights in the space.

• If he needs a feed, you can do that in the lounge room or in the bedroom with the blinds open and lights on. Keeping the environment bright helps reinforce that it’s the start of the day.

Wake, Feed, Play, Sleep Routine

You’re doing such a great job with this routine already! It’s completely understandable to feel a little uncertain when you see those hunger-like signs before a nap, like finger smacking or sucking on his hands. But often, babies use these actions as a way to soothe themselves—it’s their natural way of calming down, even if they’re not truly hungry.

If he’s having a full feed at the start of his wake window, it’s likely he’s not actually hungry again before his nap. So, if he’s gaining weight well and you feel comfortable, you could try settling him to sleep when you notice these signs instead of offering another feed. This can help reinforce that it’s time to sleep rather than eat.

The one exception to this is bedtime. It’s completely normal for babies to have two feeds in that final wake window—one when they wake from their last nap and another just before bed. That final feed helps fill his tummy and encourages a longer, more restful stretch of sleep at the beginning of the night.

Nap Routine Suggestions

Right now, he’s used to falling asleep with your singing and rocking, which is such a loving and comforting way for him to settle. However, because he’s relying on that movement and sound to fall asleep, it can be challenging for him to stay asleep once you transfer him to the crib.

I also noticed you’re using the settling pyramid after placing him in the crib once he’s already asleep. To help him learn to fall asleep in the crib, we need him to be awake when you lay him down and then apply the settling pyramid. So if you feel ready to try this there are two possible options.

Option 1: Adjusted Nap Routine (Using the Settling Pyramid)

This approach helps him gradually learn to fall asleep in the crib:

1. Walk into the bedroom.

2. Put on his sleep sack.

3. Sing your song while holding and rocking him.

4. After singing the song once, lay him down in the crib while he’s still awake and use the settling pyramid to help him fall asleep.

This approach may take some practice, but it teaches him how to settle himself to sleep in the crib, which will help him stay asleep longer once he’s there.

Option 2: Gradual Approach (If laying him down awake feels too difficult right now)

If he’s not quite ready to be placed awake in the crib, this gentler approach can help him learn to settle without relying on constant movement. Here’s how:

1. Walk into the bedroom.

2. Put on his sleep sack.

3. Sing your song while holding and rocking him.

4. After singing the song once, stop singing but continue patting and rocking him.

5. Gradually reduce the rocking until you’re just patting.

6. Then, stop patting and allow him to fall asleep in your arms without movement.

This option helps him practice falling asleep with less and less input from you, which makes it much easier when you’re ready to start using the settling pyramid in the crib.

Introducing the Settling Pyramid at Bedtime

I know you mentioned that you’re hoping to use the settling pyramid technique for nighttime sleep once it’s working well during naps.

But at 3 months old, your baby’s circadian rhythm and natural sleep pressure are both working strongly in your favour at bedtime. Plus, babies tend to fall into their deepest, most restful sleep during the first part of the night, which means bedtime is often the best opportunity to try settling him in the crib.

Because of this natural sleep drive, he’s more likely to settle and sleep for a longer stretch at the start of the night compared to other times.

So, if you feel ready, it could be worth trying the settling pyramid technique at bedtime—even if you’re still working on naps during the day.

if you do feel ready to do this is bedtime routine might look like this:

1. Feed him in the living room keeping a dim light on to prevent him from falling asleep during the feed.

2. Once he starts feeding less actively, pause and change his diaper.

3. Put on his sleep sack.

4. Finish the feed if needed, so his tummy is nice and full.

5. Walk into his bedroom and sing his song while holding and rocking him.

6. Lay him down in the co-sleeper while he’s still awake and use the settling pyramid to help him drift off to sleep.

If you feel that laying him down awake might be too difficult, you can try a more gradual approach:

1. Feed him in the living room with a dim light on to help keep him awake.

2. When he starts to feed less actively, pause the feed and change his diaper.

3. Put on his sleep sack.

4. Finish the feed if needed, so his tummy is nice and full.

5. Walk into his bedroom and sing his song while holding and rocking him.

6. After singing the song, slowly reduce the movement:

   • Stop rocking but continue patting.

   • Stop patting and let him fall asleep in your arms without movement.

7. Once he’s fully asleep, gently place him in the crib.

Does this sound okay?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Marien,

It’s fantastic to hear that your little one is sleeping so well overnight in the crib and even taking a solid 2-hour nap in the morning. That’s truly amazing progress for an 8-week-old!

It’s also great that she has a consistent wake-up time and you’ve recently started a nap routine—those are both wonderful foundations to build on.

At 8 weeks of age, wake windows are so short, and feeds take up so much time that it’s completely normal for babies to wake, feed, and then fall right back to sleep. Over the next month, you’ll likely notice her staying awake a bit longer after feeds and having some playtime. That’s when you can start using the settling pyramid more often.

When she does stay awake after a feed, you might consider tweaking her nap routine to include a lullaby or you singing a favourite song while gently patting her bottom as you walk around. This lullaby will become a comforting sleep cue, making the transition to falling asleep in the crib using the settling pyramid much easier when she’s ready.

Here’s a simple routine you could try:

1. Walk into her bedroom

2. Swaddle her

3. Walk around the dark room with her lying in your arms, singing a lullaby and gently patting her bottom

4. Stop singing and stand still, continuing to pat her bottom

From here, you have two options:

• Lay her down in the crib and try the settling pyramid

• Hold her in your arms until she falls asleep

If you choose to keep holding her, just make sure to stay still. This helps her learn to fall asleep without movement, making it easier to transition to the crib using the settling pyramid when you’re both ready.

Something else to consider: The first nap of the day is often the easiest for babies to fall asleep. So, if you’re looking to try the settling pyramid, starting with that nap might set you up for the most success.

You’re doing an amazing job, and for an 8-week-old, she’s doing so well!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Stephanie,

Hopefully, the last few days have been okay without the pacifier.

Regarding extending naps after a short 20-minute nap, you’re absolutely right that it’s very challenging. Sleep pressure (the drive to sleep) builds up during wake time and dissipates during sleep. When your little one wakes from a short nap, they simply don’t have enough sleep pressure built up to fall back asleep, even if you try to resettle them. So, my recommendation is to get him up and start the next wake window once he wakes from a short nap. That will allow the sleep pressure to build back up for his next nap.

As for the naps in the carrier, that’s completely fine and won’t hinder his ability to consolidate naps in the crib eventually. While he may have longer naps in the carrier now, what will happen over time is as he learns to fall asleep on his own in the crib and his naps naturally consolidate, he will start having longer naps (around 1–2 hours) in the crib. This often starts to happen somewhere between 5–6 months. And yes, waking him after 2 hours in the carrier is a great idea!

About the crying and protesting when going into the bedroom for naps – it’s possible it’s related to overtiredness, but another likely explanation is that he’s becoming more aware that going into his room means it’s time to sleep. To help break that pattern of crying as soon as you enter the bedroom, you could try tweaking his nap routine a little.

For example, try putting his sleep sack on in the lounge or living room instead of his bedroom. After that, walk around with him for a bit while he’s lying in your arms. Then, when he’s calm and settled, walk into his room, turn off the lights, close the blinds, turn on the white noise machine, and then sing a lullaby before laying him down in his crib. This small change in routine could help him feel more relaxed and comfortable going into his bedroom.

Regarding wake windows, you’re absolutely right that they can vary throughout the day. When babies have a short nap, their wake window is usually shorter (it can be as short as 45 minutes). When they have a longer nap, their wake window tends to be longer (up to 1.5 hours). It’s all about how quickly they build up sleep pressure. Think of it like a fuel tank – after a short nap, there’s still some sleepy fuel left, so it doesn’t take long to fill the tank back up before they’re ready to sleep again. But after a long nap, they’ll wake up with an empty tank, and it takes longer to fill it up before they’re ready to sleep again.

Instead of sticking to strict wake windows, I recommend combining age-appropriate wake windows (which for his age are typically between 45 minutes and 1.5 hours) with watching for tired signs and following the general pattern of wake, feed, play, sleep. Given that he’s having short naps in the morning, you might find he only stays awake for about 45 minutes before needing another nap.

I hope this helps!
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Aditi,

Unfortunately, it can be tricky to get babies back to sleep after the 5am feed because their sleep pressure is low—they’ve already had over 7 – 9 hours of sleep—and their circadian rhythm is naturally encouraging them to wake up around this time.

What should happen is that once your little one learns to fall asleep independently in her crib or bassinet, she’ll start having longer stretches of sleep at night before waking for a feed. Over time, those overnight feeds tend to drop, often settling into a single feed between 1-4am, allowing her to sleep until her natural wake-up time.

Until she masters this skill, here are some things you can try:

1. Treat the 5am feed like a nighttime feed:

   • Keep the lights off and follow your usual wake, feed, sleep routine.

2. Block out early morning light:

   • If light is creeping in, cover it to prevent her circadian rhythm from thinking it’s time to start the day.

3. Pause before responding:

   • When she starts to stir, wait a moment to see if she’s truly awake.

   • If her noises are intermittent with pauses, give her space to settle herself back to sleep.

   • If her cries are consistent without pauses, that’s her signal she needs you.

4. Try a 4am feed (if needed):

   • If she’s consistently waking between 5-6am and struggling to go back to sleep, you can try gently waking her at 4am for a quick feed.

   • This might help her sleep through until 6am, but sometimes it can backfire and cause her to wake up for the day at 4am.

   • If that happens, just skip trying it the next day.

I hope that helps!

Emma

• This reply was modified 1 year ago by  Emma H.
• This reply was modified 1 year ago by  Emma H.
• This reply was modified 1 year ago by  Emma H.

[Emma H]

Hi Aditi,

That’s a great question—and I completely understand your concern. You’re absolutely right that once your little one learns to fall asleep independently and starts connecting her sleep cycles on her own, her nap lengths will naturally begin to improve.

In the meantime, though, it’s all about finding a balance that works best for both her and you.

It’s totally okay to rescue one or two naps with contact naps if that helps her get more restorative sleep during the day. Short naps can lead to more frequent wake windows, which can build up sleep pressure and make the end of the day more challenging. So if you find that extending a couple of naps makes the day run more smoothly, that’s a great option.

If you are going to rescue naps, I’d recommend focusing on the first and second naps, as these are usually the most restorative and easiest to extend.

There are a few ways to go about this:

• Option 1: Settle her to sleep in your arms (without movement, if you’re not yet using the settling pyramid for naps), then transfer her to the crib. As her first sleep cycle is ending, go into her room just before she stirs and gently pat or shush her back to sleep. This doesn’t work for every baby, but some respond really well to this kind of gentle resettling.

• Option 2: If she stirs and isn’t able to resettle in the crib, you can pick her up and hold her for the next sleep cycle.

• Option 3: You can skip the crib entirely and go straight to a contact nap from the start.

Ideally, she’ll get at least part of the nap in the crib, but if that’s not working right now, it’s completely fine to go with what helps her get the sleep she needs.

Does that sound okay?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Rita,

It’s so wonderful to hear that she’s back to connecting her sleep cycles and getting those longer stretches overnight—she’s come such a long way, and you’ve done an amazing job supporting her!

Based on our previous conversations, I’m assuming she’s now falling asleep in her crib at night, using the settling pyramid if needed. If that’s the case, you can absolutely begin using the same approach for her daytime naps.

Here are a couple of ways you can approach this transition:

Option 1: Use the Settling Pyramid for All Naps

If you’d like to fully transition away from the sling, you can begin using the settling pyramid for all of her naps. Since the timing of her naps is already consistent, you’d follow her usual nap schedule but instead of settling her to sleep in the sling, you would simply do a shorter version of her bedtime routine, which she’s already familiar with. Here’s a sample routine you might try:

• Put her in the sleeping bag before entering the bedroom, and spend a few minutes walking around a bright, active space to help her wind down.

• Head into her room, dim the lights, and gently walk while singing the same lullaby you use at bedtime, with some light patting on her back or bottom.

• After the lullaby finishes, lay her down in the crib and begin the settling pyramid if needed.

A small tweak that can make a big difference at this age (around 5 months) is doing the “watch and listen” step outside the room, using a baby monitor. Babies become more aware of their surroundings at this age and can become upset if they see you in the room but you’re not actively comforting them. Try laying her down, leaving the room, and watching her cues.

If she calls out with pauses in between, give her a bit of space—sometimes it takes up to 20 minutes for babies to fall asleep. But if the crying is continuous with no pauses, that’s your cue to go in and climb the pyramid as needed. Once you’re in the room, stay with her until she falls asleep. Coming and going repeatedly can be confusing and more distressing for her.

Just a heads-up: if you start using the settling pyramid for all naps, naps may be shorter for a little while. This is completely normal as she learns the new skill. Over time, the first and second naps are likely to lengthen, while the third and fourth may remain short.

Option 2: Start with Just the First Nap

If applying the settling pyramid for all naps feels like too much right now—especially if you’re mindful of your wrists—another great option is to start with just the first nap.

This nap is usually the most consistent, especially if her wake-up time is within a regular 30-minute window, and babies generally find it easiest to settle at this time. Once she’s settling well for this nap, you can gradually introduce the settling pyramid for the second nap, then the third, and so on.

A Few Additional Tips:

• When she stirs mid-nap, pause before going in. If she’s just transitioning between sleep cycles, she may settle back to sleep on her own if given the chance. If the cries are continuous with no breaks, that usually means she’s fully awake and needs support.

• Since you’re starting to work on independent settling for naps, I recommend sticking with the 4-nap routine for now. Her nap lengths and timing might shift slightly during this learning phase, but once she’s consistently settling and lengthening naps, we can look at moving to a 3-nap schedule—if she doesn’t make that shift naturally on her own.

Does that sound okay?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Emily,
Thank you so much for taking the time to answer my questions in such detail—I really appreciate it. It sounds like you’re doing an incredible job staying responsive to your little one’s needs, even through some very long and tiring nights.

From what you’ve described, you’re absolutely right that resettling and self-soothing are the biggest challenges right now. The fact that he’s waking every 50–60 minutes overnight and every 25 minutes for naps—especially with those patterns being so consistent—suggests he’s waking at the end of each sleep cycle and relying on you to help him fall back to sleep, usually by feeding or rocking. This is how he’s learned to fall asleep, so naturally, he needs those same conditions when he wakes again.

The key to reducing these frequent wakes (and getting you both more rest!) is to help him learn to fall asleep independently, without feeding or rocking. Once he develops this skill, he’ll be much more likely to link sleep cycles on his own.

I think one reason the settling pyramid hasn’t been as effective yet is that he may be having micro-sleeps while feeding—particularly during those long daytime feeds. Sucking is soothing, and many babies do drift off while nursing, even briefly. When this happens, he’s likely taking the edge off his sleep pressure—the natural drive to sleep—which then makes it harder for him to fall asleep when it’s actually time for a nap. He might either resist settling (because he’s not quite tired enough), or fall asleep briefly in your arms but wake shortly after being placed in the crib.

Here are a few things we can try to help increase the effectiveness of the settling pyramid:

1. Keep him fully awake during daytime feeds

This can be tricky, but it really helps. Try offering feeds 5–10 minutes after he wakes from a nap, and do them in a bright, stimulating environment (like a room with some background noise or gentle activity).

If he starts getting drowsy mid-feed—often indicated by slower or less frequent swallowing—pause the feed, sit him up, or change his diaper to help him wake up again. Then continue feeding if needed. If the feed has already been long enough, you can move straight into playtime.

How have the last few days gone with trying this?

2. Try extending his wake windows by 15 minutes

This might help build up just a little more sleep pressure, making it easier for him to settle and stay asleep during naps. Give it a try and see if he seems more ready to settle when he’s had a bit more awake time.

3. Pacifier use

It sounds like the pacifier may be contributing to shorter naps if it falls out and he wakes looking for it. How has it gone trying to remove the pacifier before he falls asleep? Has he been able to settle without it?

One last thing to consider: if either you or your husband snore loudly, that could also be causing your little one to rouse between sleep cycles overnight. Loud or sudden noises close to his sleep space can make it harder for him to settle or return to sleep on his own.

In terms of the white noise machine—yes, it’s perfectly safe to leave on all night, as long as the volume is kept at a safe level (ideally below 50 – 60 decibels and placed at least 1 meter from the crib). White noise can be really helpful in blocking out sudden environmental noises and masking the noises of you and your husband sleeping in the same room.

I hope this helps,
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Aditi,

Thanks so much for taking the time to answer my questions—I really appreciate the detail you’ve shared.

From what you’ve described, it sounds like your little one’s sleep patterns are maturing. The longer time it’s taking her to fall asleep at bedtime, along with the increased need to “rescue” naps, suggests she’s becoming more aware of how she’s falling asleep—particularly in your arms—and is beginning to rely on that to stay asleep.

Your plan to start working on independent sleep is a fantastic next step. Bedtime is a great place to begin because her circadian rhythm and sleep pressure are both working in your favour, making it more likely that she’ll successfully settle with less assistance. Practicing the settling pyramid at bedtime is a smart move and a gentle way to support her in learning this skill.

It also sounds like shifting her final feed to between 6–7pm is working well—especially since she’s now sleeping a longer stretch rather than waking an hour later for another feed. That’s exactly what you want to see at this age, so I’d recommend continuing with that timing.

Bedtime routine:

In terms of her bedtime routine, you could try tweaking the order slightly so the more alerting or stimulating activities happen earlier, and the calming ones are closer to sleep. So it might look a little like this:

• Feed

• Diaper change

• Massage

• PJs on

• Sleep sack on (this can be alerting, so best to do this before the wind-down begins)

• Dim the lights

• Turn on the sound machine

• Read 1–2 books

• Say goodnight

• Gently bounce while singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (3x)

• Lay her in the bassinet and begin using the settling pyramid to support her to fall asleep in the bassinet.

For daytime naps:

If you have the energy, you could begin helping her learn to fall asleep without movement while still in your arms—this is a gentle bridge before moving to the settling pyramid for naps. So her nap routine might look like:

• Sleep sack on

• Close curtains

• Turn on sound machine

• Gently bounce and sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star (3x)

• Then stop bouncing and simply hold and shush

• Gradually fade out the shushing, and allow her to drift off without movement

Something else you could try is slightly stretching her wake windows by 10–15 minutes. If she’s not quite tired enough, this can result in nap “false starts” or short naps. A small increase might help her build enough sleep pressure to fall asleep and stay asleep more easily.

Daytime Sleep Expectations:

At 14 weeks, the average total sleep in 24 hours is around 14–17 hours, so if she’s getting 11.5 hours overnight, she may need anywhere from 3.5 to 5.5 hours of naps during the day. That upper range is less common though, generally the lower end is more common.

Short naps (30–45 minutes) are still very typical at this age, which is why 4–5 naps per day is normal. Often, if one nap runs long, it pushes the next ones later, and you’ll only fit in four naps. The next day, all her naps might be short again and she’ll need five. That back-and-forth is completely normal at this stage.

One way to help encourage a more predictable nap routine is to keep waking her at 7:00–7:30am, and aim for that first nap to begin around 8:30–9:00am. Once that first nap becomes consistent, the second, third, and so on tend to naturally fall into place as well.

Does this sound possible?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Pav,

That’s great to hear—you’ve done an excellent job noticing how a small change in your routine has led to a longer second nap. Hopefully, that continues!

It’s also a great approach to leave him in the cot if he’s happy and to consistently start the day at 7am. If he begins waking more consistently around 6:30am, that may simply become his natural wake-up time. In that case, you could look at slightly stretching his wake windows or shifting his first nap to around 9:00–9:15am.

But honestly, it sounds like following his lead is working really well right now. So I would just keep doing that.
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Pav,

It’s great to hear from you!

You’ve done such a great job navigating the 3-to-2 nap transition and moving!,

From everything you’ve described, Rohan’s sleep is actually in a really solid place—especially with those consistent 12-hour nights. Given the big changes he’s recently experienced (moving, teething, and developmental leaps like crawling), it’s completely normal for naps to be a bit unpredictable. During times of transition, babies often prioritise night sleep over naps, and it’s not uncommon for the second nap to be shorter, especially if he’s waking happy and handling his wake windows well.

Right now, the total amount of sleep he’s getting (around 14 hours in 24 hours) is within a great range, so if this current pattern is working for him and you, there’s no need to change anything. However, if you’d like to encourage a more balanced nap structure, there are a couple of things you could try.

Based on what you’ve shared, Rohan’s current nap schedule looks something like this:

• 7:00 AM – Wake-up
• 9:45/10:00 AM – First nap
• 11:30 AM – Wake
• 3:00 PM – Second nap
• 3:45 PM – Wake
• 7:00 PM – Bedtime

A more typical 2-nap schedule at this age often follows this pattern:

• 7:00 AM – Wake-up
• 9:00 AM – First nap
• 10:00/10:30 AM – Wake
• 1:00/1:30 PM – Second nap
• 2:30/3:00 PM – Wake
• 7:00 PM – Bedtime

On a two-nap schedule, wake windows typically lengthen throughout the day, often following a 2-3-4 pattern—a 2-hour wake window before the first nap, 3 hours before the second nap, and 4 hours before bedtime. You could try shifting his naps slightly to align with this rhythm and see how he responds. If you do, I’d recommend giving it at least 3 days to allow his body clock to adjust.

If you think he will struggle with these wake windows, you could try:

• Shifting his first nap slightly earlier (by about 15 minutes).
• Capping the first nap at ~45 minutes (one sleep cycle) to ensure there’s enough sleep pressure for a longer second nap.
• Scheduling the second nap around 1:00 PM, which aligns with the natural circadian dip in the early afternoon, making it easier for babies to fall asleep.
• Capping the second nap at 3:00 PM at the latest (if he sleeps that long).

If you try this approach, I’d recommend sticking with it for 3–4 days to see if it helps create a more balanced nap structure.

That said, if he’s waking happy, handling wake windows well, and continuing to sleep solidly overnight, this may simply be his natural rhythm for now. Some babies naturally prefer one long nap and one shorter one, and as long as he’s well-rested, there’s no need to force a change.

And if you’re wondering how this might affect his future transition to one nap, don’t worry! When the time comes, we’ll simply gradually shift the first nap later until it consolidates into one midday nap. His current pattern won’t make that transition any harder when the time comes.

I hope that helps!

Emma