Emma H
Forum Replies Created
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Hi Taylor!
It’s so good that you have been able to work through the course and start the strategies already.
But even more importantly, successfully help your little one fall asleep in the crib for his first nap today! I am so excited for you!
Hopefully, you got to enjoy a tea or coffee, some breakfast, or a shower during this nap!
It’s not surprising to hear that your little one starts crying as soon as you lay him down in the bassinet for later naps. You will find that you might have more success with the first nap of the day, and each consecutive nap requires a little more effort to settle them down. Babies tend to find it easier to fall asleep for their first nap.
It can also be helpful to remember your little one is learning a new way to fall asleep, so he will need time to get familiar with it.
If you’re happy to continue using the settling pyramid, responding to his needs and picking him up to settle him back down if needed. Once he calms down in your arms, if you have the energy and time, lay him back down in the crib and descend the pyramid. For example, lay him down and immediately start patting and shushing him. As he calms down more, stop patting him and continue shushing. Then move to shushing out of view, and if he stays calm, stop shushing and watch him.
Regarding your question, why doesn’t he cry when you lay him down in the crib with the lights when you need hands-free time? One possible reason for this is timing. He might not be tired at this point. If he isn’t tired, he may be happy lying on his back looking around the room and, therefore, doesn’t need to communicate to you through crying that he wants something. But when you place him in the crib for sleep, he is tired and lets you know that by crying. Does that make sense?
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Natalee,
I hope you enjoyed your holiday!
Now that you’re back into the routine of everyday life, you can certainly return to having your little one nap in a crib.
Applying the settling pyramid techniques is the best way to help him learn to nap in a crib. However, a slower approach could be implementing a nap routine, which you do even if you plan for him to fall asleep on you. Part of this nap routine should include a calming activity as the last activity (e.g. singing a song as you rock him in your arms) before letting him fall asleep on you or in the crib. The idea is that these activities will become a sleep cue for your baby so that when you are ready to practice laying him down in the crib for naps, he will know what is expected of him and find it easier to fall asleep.
When he does fall asleep while napping on you, you could also consider laying him down in the crib to finish his nap. But know that he will likely have a short nap. This is because catnaps are normal. At this age, babies wake between sleep cycles (which are every 30 – 45 minutes), and if they need help falling asleep or their sleeping environment has changed (so he is no longer lying on you), they are likely to wake fully.
Another option is to only apply the settling pyramid for his first nap of the day. Babies tend to find it easier to fall asleep for this first nap, so you are more likely to have success with this one. Then, for the other naps, you can continue offering contact naps. Once he starts to sleep in the crib for the morning nap, you could apply the settling pyramid for the second nap of the day and continue contact napping for the other naps. Then, once he is sleeping in the crib for the first and second nap, you can apply the settling pyramid for the third nap and so on, until he is sleeping in the crib for all of his naps (when you’re at home, of course!)
I hope this helps!
Emma
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Hi Jean-Benoit!
It’s great you have been able to work with your baby’s pediatrician to identify the milk intolerance, and you have the support to work through any other concerns with your little one’s health. Did your baby’s pediatrician say how long it should take before you see some changes in your baby’s discomfort due to the milk intolerance? I am not an expert on this topic, but I have worked with other parents whose babies have had milk intolerances and were told that it could take up to 2 weeks after starting the formula to see some improvements. If this isn’t something you have discussed with the pediatrician, then it might be helpful to know, particularly if your baby’s restlessness/difficulty sleeping might be due to pain (due to the milk intolerance), and this should resolve soon.
In regards to your question, is it too late? It’s never too late to implement these practices. It’s great to hear you already have a good environment and a bedtime routine.
I just have a few questions.
1. How does your little one sleep during the day? E.g., how long does she nap for, where does she sleep, what is she wearing and how does she fall asleep)?
2. When she wakes every 20 – 45 minutes during the night is this at the beginning of the night, in the second half of the night or the early morning hours or all through the night?
If it is at the beginning of the night, is there a time that she tends to settle into a deeper sleep? If you’re not sure about this, consider writing down the time she settles into a deeper sleep for the next few nights. If you find it is the same time, for example at around 10 pm she falls into a deeper sleep, then her bedtime might be 10 pm at this point and the constant wakes at the beginning of the night is because she isn’t truly tired. Shifting her bedtime to a later time might resolve these short naps at the start of the night.
3. Are you having to hold her in your arms all night or are there times when you can place her in the crib?
In regards to what you can do in the now all the strategies in the course will help you get longer stretches of sleep in the crib, but here are the main things I recommend you try. Remember that these strategies take time, so if they don’t work the first, second, or third time, please persist.
1. Apply the settling pyramid for naps and bedtime (if you don’t have the energy – as I know you would both be exhausted – just attempt the morning nap. Babies tend to find it easier to fall asleep for their first nap. This strategy allows her to lay in the crib and potentially fall asleep in the crib rather than in your arms.
2. Consider trying other swaddles. Babies are sometimes pros at escaping one brand of swaddle but not others. Have you tried other swaddles with your baby’s arms down by her side? In particular, have you tried the HALO SleepSack Swaddle?
3. When your little one initially stirs, remember to pause. Listen to her callouts and watch her movements. If the calling out becomes persistent and there are no pauses, then it is likely she is awake. If there are pauses between the callouts and they stay the volume, give her some time, as she might be in active sleep or passing between sleep cycles and might return to sleep.
4. When she wakes during the night for a feed, keep the lights low (use red light if possible) and keep distractions to a minimum. Follow the unwrap (if using a swaddle), feed, change the diaper and re-swaddle (if needed), feed, and then sleep routine.
5. Have a set morning wake-up time. This will help reset her circadian rhythm each morning and should encourage a regular bedtime and more sleep during the night.
I hope this helps!
Emma
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Hi Maya,
The CIO approach can be highly distressing, so I really hope you’re all doing ok!
Before I provide any advice, I was hoping you could give more information about your little one’s sleep.
Can you expand on what you mean when you say he naps well during the day? In particular, I have the following questions:
- How long are his naps?
- How many naps does he generally have each day?
- Where does he usually nap? For example, in a crib, your arms, a recliner, or a baby carrier.
- How does he fall asleep for naps? For example, do you complete a nap routine and then lay him down in the crib to fall asleep, or do you rock/feed/hold him until he falls asleep?
Regarding his overnight sleep, I have the following questions:
- What time is his bedtime?
- How does he fall asleep?
- How long does he initially sleep at the start of the night?
- How often is he waking throughout the night?
- How often are you feeding him, and when you feed him, where do you feed him?
- Where does he sleep?
Regarding his restless legs, have you been able to take a recording of this to show the doctor? If not, I recommend you record your baby while he sleeps during one of these episodes and keep a written record of how often and how long these restless leg movements occur over 2 – 3 nights. Once you have done this, I recommend you take it to his doctor to show him the recording and the data to see if the restless leg movements are more than typical behaviour.
Emma
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Hi Emma,
I hope you’re doing okay. It can be hard when you have such broken sleep.
The 4-month regression is a tough time due to the maturation of your little one’s sleep. He is now progressing through 4 sleep stages and may wake briefly between sleep cycles. If he needs help falling asleep, he may wake up fully and call out to you, leading to multiple overnight wakes.
All the information in the program will be helpful, but two particular parts will be the most helpful. There is a video titled ‘Managing Catnaps,’ which provides specific information regarding strategies to help with catnaps during the day. There is also a pdf titled ‘Managing The 4 Month Regression,’ which provides specific strategies to help with overnight wakes during this stage.
In both of these lessons, I talk about how important it is to teach them to fall asleep independently. The way you can do this is by using the settling pyramid for naps and bedtime. In the video titled ‘The Simple Process to Settle Your Baby to Sleep’ I show you exactly how to use the settling pyramid.
Hopefully you find these strategies helpful and start seeing longer stretches of sleep overnight and more naps soon!
Emma
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Hi Emily!
I hope you got a few more hours of sleep last night and you’re not too exhausted!
I’ve answered your questions based on what you have said, but I am more than happy for you to provide more details/clarify points if you have any questions based on what I have written.
Regarding your first question, you could try an earlier bedtime and see what happens. The exact timing of this earlier bedtime will depend on your baby’s last nap. If, for example, his last nap of the day finishes at 5 pm, then he might not be ready for bed until 7 or 7.30 pm (as they generally have a wake window of 2-2.5 hours at this point). But if his last nap finishes at 4 pm, he might be ready for bed at 6 or 6.30 pm.
In regards to moving him into his own bedroom, the AAP recommends babies stay in the same room until 6 months of age, due to the SIDS risk, so I wouldn’t recommend moving him to his own room at this point. But in saying that, if you do want (as I know they can be super noisy), I recommend you talk to your baby’s doctor to see if your little one is at low risk, and they would be ok with recommending they sleep in another room.
If you want to keep him in the room with you until he is 6 months old, then a middle ground might be giving him a separate sleep space (eg, crib) to sleep in if you haven’t already. I have also had parents wear an earplug in one ear overnight to reduce the noise level but still ensure they can hear their little one. This might also be an option.
I recommend using the pyramid techniques now for daytime naps and bedtime if you’re happy to. This way, you’re allowing him to practice falling asleep independently. You can apply the pyramid techniques with the pacifier. But if you find yourself replacing the pacifier to help him fall asleep or throughout the night, I recommend you consider removing the pacifier. For some babies, pacifiers can lead to more restlessness and wakes, particularly in the early morning hours when they’re in lighter sleep, as they need the pacifier to fall back to sleep. If this is the case with your little one, removing the pacifier and helping him learn to fall asleep without the pacifier should help reduce his restlessness and wakes during the night.
Also, based on what you said, do you think he is stirring from 12.30/1 until 2.30/3 am and then again from 4.30 – 7 am because he is hungry? Feeding him slightly earlier might reduce the need to constantly pop the pacifier back in, especially from 4.30 – 7 am. If you’re happier to feed him slightly earlier, your night might look like this:
- When he stirs at 12.30/1pm you give him his first feed of the night.
- You give him his second feed when he stirs again at 4.30am.
- Then he sleeps until 7am when he wakes for the day.
You might be a little concerned that you’re increasing his overnight feeds. But working on the pyramid techniques with naps and bedtime, plus all the other strategies mentioned in the course (e.g., keeping the bedroom dark and free from sudden loud noises, keeping stimulation low and the lights dim overnight, keeping a set wake-up time, etc.), will help your little one start to stretch the length of time he sleeps overnight and hopefully give you some more rest too.
Regarding his daytime naps, I wouldn’t necessarily wake him from a long nap if you find that he isn’t having a long wake period in the middle of the night. Instead, aim to have a consistent wake-up time. A consistent wake-up time will help reset your little one’s circadian rhythm (which will also help make bedtimes more consistent and encourage longer stretches of sleep overnight) and lead to a regular time for his first nap of the day. Once this nap time becomes consistent, the second naps will become more consistent, and so on.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Sophie,
From what you’ve said, I wouldn’t say you are leaving it too late to put him down. If he is used to falling asleep another way (eg. being rocked in your arms or held etc) then your little one might need a little more help from you as he becomes familiar with being laid down to sleep. Basically, it would feel different for your little one. Just continue using the pyramid to help him fall asleep and he will soon become familiar with this new routine.
Also, it can be helpful to remember that catnaps (so naps for 30 – 45 mins) during the day are normal behaviour at this age. Letting your little one sleep in a dark bedroom free from sudden loud noise and helping him learn how to fall asleep independently will ensure that when he is developmentally able to join sleep cycles, he will be able to.
I hope that helps!
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Since I started this thread, it’s only fair if I go first 🙂.
I’m Emma, a Paediatric Occupational Therapist from Canberra, Australia.
I’m a mum of 3 – 2 girls, one boy, aged between 1 and 7.
The big news in our house at the moment is our 1 year old took her first steps yesterday! By sheer luck we were all sitting together when it happened, so the whole family got to see it and join in the celebrations as well 😂. One of those joyful little events with the family that I absolutely love.
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That’s so good. You’re doing so well. Keep it up and hopefully it’s even more great news in a few weeks!
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Wow Emily it sounds like you have made such great gains already!
Also super excited for you that this mornings nap went so smoothly.
If you’re happy to keep me updated, I would love to know how you go over the next few nights/weeks.