[Emma H]

Hi Pav,

It’s so good to hear from you again. I can’t believe Rohan is nearly 15 months!

Regarding your question about his nap schedule – at 15 months, many toddlers are starting to transition from two naps to one, though the exact timing varies. Based on what you’ve described, it does sound like Rohan might be approaching that stage. Here’s why:

1. Longer Wake Windows: His current wake windows (3.25/3.5/4) are already on the higher end for a two-nap schedule. If he’s taking longer to fall asleep at bedtime and still seems content during the day, it could be a sign that he’s ready for a bit of a shift.

2. Shorter Night Sleep: Less than 11 hours overnight is on the lower side for his age, and it might be because his total daytime sleep is cutting into his night sleep.

Here are a couple of options to consider:

Option 1: Gradual Transition to One Nap

• Start by slightly pushing his first nap later each day by 15 minutes every 3 days. For example, move it from 9:45 to 10:00, then 10:15, and so on, until it’s around 11:30 or 12:00.
• Or you could just drop that first nap and offer him a nap at 11:30ish/12pm if you feel like he would tolerate that?
• Let him sleep as long as he needs for this nap (up to 2-2.5 hours).
• On days when he seems overtired by bedtime, you could move bedtime earlier (e.g., 6:30-7:00 pm).

Option 2: Adjust the Two-Nap Schedule

If you’re not ready to drop to one nap just yet, you could try shortening the first nap to 45 minutes. This might allow him to take a longer second nap and feel more rested overall. For example:

• Wake him at 10:30 from the first nap.
• Offer the second nap around 2:00-2:15 and let him sleep up to 1.5 hours.
• Keep bedtime consistent at 7:45 or slightly earlier if needed.

A Few Things to Keep in Mind:

• Teething: As you mentioned, teething can make him more tired, so it’s okay to be flexible and adjust based on how he’s feeling each day.
• Trial and Error: Transitions can take a few weeks to settle, so don’t worry if things feel a bit bumpy at first. Watch how Rohan responds and tweak the schedule as needed.
• Total Sleep Needs: At his age, most toddlers need around 12-14 hours of total sleep in 24 hours. If he’s getting close to that range (e.g., 10.5-11 hours at night and 2-3 hours during the day), he’s likely doing just fine.

Do you think he is ready to drop to 1 nap a day?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Thais,

I am so sorry I seemed to have missed your question – so I am very sorry for the delayed reply!

It’s so good to hear that you have made such great progress over the past month and your little one is now mostly sleeping in the crib. You must have put in a lot of work this past month, as that level of improvement is huge!

Regarding your questions, I have answered them below.

Early Wake-Ups

Waking at 5–5:30 a.m. can be tough, especially when your target is 6–6:30 a.m. Here’s what I’d recommend:

• Resettling vs. Starting the Day: If he wakes early, I’d avoid starting the day at 5 a.m. unless absolutely necessary. Instead, try to keep the room dark and calm, and use the pyramid method to encourage him to resettle. If that doesn’t work, nursing him in your bed is okay for now, but try to keep it low-key and avoid stimulating him. The goal is to signal that it’s still nighttime. As you have noticed, though he might struggle to fall back asleep even with a feed because his sleep pressure is low and his body clock is encouraging him to wake. If these early morning wake-ups continue, it might mean that we need to tweak his sleep routine slightly.
• First Nap Timing: If he wakes early, adjust his first nap slightly earlier based on his wake window. For example, if his wake window is 1 hour 45 minutes and he wakes at 5:30 a.m., aim for a nap around 7:15 a.m. This helps prevent over tiredness while keeping the rest of the day on track.

Progress Stall at Bedtime

It’s great that he’s settling so well for naps and most of the night! The hand-sucking agitation and your intervention are common at this stage. Here’s how to approach it:

• Holding His Arms: It’s okay to hold his arms gently as part of the pyramid if it helps him settle. This won’t interfere with self-soothing as long as you’re gradually reducing your involvement over time.
• Pacifier Use: The pacifier for naps likely isn’t causing the hand-sucking at bedtime. At this age, babies explore self-soothing methods like sucking hands or fingers. You might find that with time, he actually prefers to suck his hand or finger to fall asleep.
• Self-Soothing and the 4-Month Sleep Regression: At four months, it’s not essential for him to fully self-soothe yet. The skills you’re teaching now (so to settle to sleep in the crib with minimal input from you) should help him pass through the 4 month regression with minimal impact on his sleep. Just keep using the settling pyramid and see if you can gradually move down the pyramid so that he falls asleep on his own without the patting and the shushing. You might find that he finds it easier to do this during the first nap of the day and at bedtime. For his later naps, you might need to continue patting and shushing him for now.

Schedule Adjustment

Babies typically move to three naps when they’re having 1-2 longer naps (over 1½ hours) during the day.

Could you share his current nap timings? For example:

• First nap: start and wake time
• Second nap: start and wake time
• Third nap: start and wake time
• Fourth nap: start and wake time

This will help me work out if he’s ready for three naps or needs to continue with four for a bit longer.

I hope this helps!

Emma

• This reply was modified 5 months, 2 weeks ago by  Emma H.

[Emma H]

Hi Ian,

It’s so great to hear that your little one is doing well with those first two naps – that’s a huge win at such a young age!

The challenges you’re describing with the later naps and bedtime are actually quite common at this age. To help me work out what’s behind it for your little one and suggest some strategies, I just have a few questions.

When you have time (which I know is extremely difficult with a 3-month-old!), could you answer these questions:

1. Does your little one have a consistent wake-up time? If so, what time is it?
2. Are you following the wake, feed, play, sleep routine during the day?
3. How many naps is she having (I’m assuming four based on what you mentioned) and what are the timing and length of these naps?
4. Do you have a nap routine? If so, what does it look like?
5. Does she have a bedtime routine? If so, what does it include?
6. What time is bedtime?
7. Does she use a pacifier?
8. Is her bedroom cool, dark and quiet?
9. Are you room sharing with her? If so, what time are you going to bed? (Sometimes early wakes can be because of our bedtimes.)
10. How are you settling her to sleep?

Sorry for all the questions!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Julia,

It’s so good to hear her sleep settled after the transition to having both arms out.

In regards, to jet lag it can be so tricky for little ones, especially with such a big time difference! It’s completely normal for Emily to struggle with this adjustment, but there are definitely things that you can do to help her reset her internal clock and get back to those longer stretches of sleep.

Here’s what I’d recommend:

1. Start the Day at the Same Time Each Morning (Local Time)

• Aim to wake Emily between 6:00 and 8:00 am local time in Malaysia, even if she’s had a rough night. This consistency will help her body adjust to the new time zone. Ideally you would want to narrow this wake up time to a 30 minute window so if you can do that, then that’s what I would recommend.
• Once she’s awake, expose her to as much natural sunlight as possible. Sunlight is one of the most effective ways to reset her circadian rhythm.

2. Keep Nighttime Calm and Dark

• When she wakes at night, keep the lights dim and avoid stimulating activities. This will reinforce the idea that nighttime is for sleeping, not playing.
• If she’s struggling to settle, you can use soothing techniques like patting, shushing, or rocking, but try to avoid engaging too much or creating new sleep associations.

3. Cap Daytime Naps

• While she’s adjusting, she might want to sleep for long stretches during the day, but try to limit her naps to no more than 2 hours each and try to keep that 3rd nap as a catnap (short nap). This will encourage her to consolidate more of her sleep overnight.
• If she’s waking after 30-45 minutes at night, it’s likely because her body still thinks it’s daytime in the UK. Shortening her daytime naps will help shift more of her sleep to nighttime.

4. Time the Last Nap Carefully

• Make sure her last nap ends with enough time for a full wake window before bedtime.

5. Stick to Your Usual Bedtime Routine

• A consistent bedtime routine will signal to Emily that it’s time to wind down, even in a new environment.

6. Be Patient with Nighttime Wakes

• It’s normal for jet lag to cause wakeful periods at night. When this happens, keep things calm and quiet, and help her settle back to sleep as soon as she seems ready.
• Avoid turning on bright lights or engaging in play, as this can reinforce the idea that nighttime is for being awake.

7. Gradual Adjustment

• If Emily is really struggling to adjust, you could try shifting her schedule gradually by 15-30 minutes each day until she’s fully aligned with the new time zone.

It might take a week or two for her to fully adjust, but with consistency and a bit of patience, she’ll get there!

Does this sound okay?

Emma

[Emma H]

No worries Györgyi.

Please let me know how you go!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Thais,

Thanks so much for letting me know what your schedule looks like. It sounds like last night was a little better which is good!

Based on what you’ve mentioned, I think we need to shift his circadian rhythm back a little so that wake up time moves closer to 6am.

Here are a few things you can do:

1. Keep the bedroom dark until 6am If there’s any light coming into the bedroom (from windows, under the door frame etc) it can signal to your little one’s brain that it’s time to wake up. Tomorrow morning when he wakes at 5 or 5:30am, have a look around the room to see if there’s any light getting in. If there is, try to block it.

2. Check for environmental noise See if there’s any street noise at this time that might be waking him. If there is, try to mask it with white noise. Also consider if you or your husband snore – this might be causing him to stir too.

3. Stretch his wake windows It sounds like he’s taking 2 long naps during the day which is great! I was wondering how you think he would go if you stretched his wake windows slightly? So the first wake window might stay at 2 hours, but the next few could be slightly longer.

For example, his routine might look like this:

• 6am – Wake
• 8am – Nap (long nap)
• 9:30/10am – Wake
• 11:30am/12pm – Nap (long nap)
• 1/1:30pm – Wake
• 3:30/4pm – Nap (catnap)
• 4/4:30pm – Wake
• 7/7:30pm – Bedtime

Do you think he would tolerate this schedule? If so, are you happy to try it for 4 days and let me know if his morning wake up time has started to shift later?

I wouldn’t expect this change to be instant, as his body clock needs time to adjust – typically, you start to notice changes after the 3rd day.

Something else to keep track of is the time he falls asleep at bedtime. If this is significantly later than 7/7:30pm with this schedule, we might need to shift his bedtime back. Ideally, we’ll end up shifting his first nap closer to 9am and his other naps back as well.

Does that make sense?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Catherine,

When babies transition to 2 naps per day, the first wake window is typically the shortest, with each wake window getting progressively longer. The final wake window before bed is usually the longest.

A typical 2-nap schedule looks like this:

• 7am – Wake
• 9am – First nap
• 10:30/11am – Wake
• 1pm – Second nap
• 2:30/3pm – Wake
• 7pm – Bedtime

Wake windows:

• Before first nap: 2 hours
• Before second nap: 2½ hours
• Before bedtime: 4 hours

Has your little one started having longer first naps?

Regarding illness – just let her sleep when she needs it. Rest is the best medicine!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Györgyi,

Based on what you’ve shared and his age, I think he’d still benefit from a 3-nap schedule. Babies typically move to 2 naps between 6-9 months, usually once they’re having 2 longer naps (around 1-2 hours each). Since his first nap is quite short, what do you think about trying this routine:

• 7am – Wake up
• 9am – First nap
• 9:30/9:45am – Wake
• 12pm – Second nap
• 1:30pm – Wake
• 4pm – Third nap
• 4:30pm – Wake
• 7pm – Bedtime

To make this work: You might need to adjust your carrier walks – either start a bit earlier or make them slightly shorter. The goal is to begin his nap routine after he’s been awake for 2 hours 15 minutes.

Also, if you follow this schedule and he’s still asleep at 9:30/9:45am, let him continue sleeping but wake him by 10:30am at the latest.

If this happens:

• Second nap would be around 1pm, finishing around 3pm
• Skip the third nap completely
• And move bedtime to 6:30pm

Does this sound doable?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Györgyi,

Sorry, I completely misunderstood – what you’ve described sounds absolutely great!

In regards to tweaking his nap schedule, could you clarify what it currently looks like? I’d love to know:

• His morning wake time (I’m assuming around 7am?)
• When he has his first and second naps
• What time he tends to wake up from each nap
• His current bedtime

Once I know what his schedule roughly looks like, I’ll be able to give you some tailored advice to help get things working even better for you both!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi,

It’s great that you’re happy to give these suggestions a go.

In regards to your little one appearing to have fuller feeds at childcare with all the busyness around her, it would definitely be worth checking in with them about the frequency that she’s feeding.

She might be having those fuller feeds because they’re only offering her a feed every 2-3 hours, and therefore when she is offered a feed she’s really hungry and taking it all at once. If this is the case, then it might be something worth trying at home too, to see if that helps reduce the grazing behaviour you’ve been experiencing.

If after trying these suggestions for a week you notice that she is still fighting bedtime and not settling to sleep until 8:45 – 9pm then let me know and we can make some more adjustments.
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Ian,

It sounds like your little one is doing really well with her first two naps – that amount of sleep is fantastic at this age!

For the third and fourth naps, it’s completely normal for these to be shorter and trickier. Given that her first two naps are so long, it’s not surprising that she’s already looking at dropping that fourth nap.

To help her settle more easily for the third nap and bedtime, I have three suggestions:

1. Narrow her morning wake-up time

At the moment, her wake-up time varies by an hour. Narrowing this to a 30-minute window will help make bedtime more consistent and encourage her to stay asleep when you lay her down.

Over the next week, could you track when she naturally wakes up each morning? This will help you figure out whether her wake-up window should be 6:30-7am or 7-7:30am. A consistent wake-up time will also help that first nap happen around the same time each day.

2. Help her have fuller feeds

You mentioned she’s a grazer (great that this is improving!). At this age, babies are so curious that even small sounds can pull their attention away from feeding.

Try this: when she wakes from a nap, let her play for a little while if she’s happy. Then offer her feed in a quiet, slightly dim room. The lack of distractions might help her focus and take a longer feed.

3. Consider shifting her bedtime

She’s currently fighting bedtime and waking shortly after you put her down. This usually means bedtime is too early or too late.

Try shifting bedtime 30 minutes earlier to 7pm for three days. Make sure that third nap finishes at least 1.5 hours before this new bedtime. And see if this new bedtime leads to less fighting. If this doesn’t help, it would be helpful to track when she naturally falls asleep and stays asleep over the next week as this might show you her ideal bedtime (which might be later than 7:30pm). If her natural bedtime is later than 7:30pm then you could try shifting her bedtime later and see if this helps. If you do need to shift her bedtime later, she might need to have 4 naps again.

Also, it’s great that she’s found her thumbs! Hopefully, this makes bedtime a little easier!

Does this sound doable?

Emma

P.S. Could you let me know the timing of her first, second and third naps? Based on what you’ve said, I’m assuming her schedule looks like this:

• 6:30/7am – Wake
• 8:30/9am – First nap
• 10/10:30am – Wake
• 12/12:30pm – Second nap
• 2/2:30pm – Wake
• 4/4:30pm – Third nap
• 4:30/5pm – Wake
• 7:30pm – Bedtime

Is this correct?

[Emma H]

Hi!

Thanks so much for answering my questions!

I have a few more questions to help work out if the difficulties with nap 3 (and 4 if needed) and bedtime are due to overtiredness. If that’s the case, we should be able to fix this by tweaking her nap schedule.

Could you let me know:

• When she generally has her naps during the day and how long each one lasts?
• How long she’s awake between nap 3 and bedtime?

This will help me see the full picture of her day!

Sorry again for the extra questions.

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Catherin,

It sounds like your little one is still in the in between stages of transitioning from 3 naps to 2. It sounds like she is nearly there though. I have answered your questions below:

1. Is 10 hours of sleep normal for her age?

At 10 months, babies typically need around 12-15 hours of total sleep in a 24-hour period, with about 10-12 hours of that being overnight sleep and the rest during naps. If she’s averaging 10 hours total, that’s on the lower end, but it’s not necessarily a cause for concern if she’s happy, alert, and meeting her developmental milestones. However, if she’s consistently sleeping only 9 hours on some days, it might indicate that her schedule could use a little tweaking to help her get closer to her sleep needs.

2. Her current schedule and nap lengths

It’s great that you’re following her cues! Transitioning to two naps can be tricky, and it’s normal for things to feel a bit inconsistent during this period. Here’s what I’d suggest based on what you’ve shared:

• Morning nap: A 20-30 minute nap in the morning is quite short for her age. Ideally, her first nap would be closer to 1-1.5 hours. Short naps can sometimes happen if she’s overtired or undertired going into the nap. From what you have said I am leaning more to overtired.
• Afternoon nap: A longer afternoon nap of 1.5-2 hours is perfectly fine! You don’t need to cap it at 1.5 hours unless it’s pushing her bedtime too late. If her afternoon nap is consistently starting at 4-4:30 pm, though, it’s likely too late in the day, which could be why bedtime is stretching to 8:30 pm. Ideally, her second nap would end by 3:30 pm to allow enough wake time before bed.

3. Adjusting her schedule

To help her get closer to 11-12 hours of total sleep, you could try the following:

• Wake time: Stick with 7 am as her consistent wake-up time.
• Morning nap: Aim for it to start at 9am and wake her if she isn’t awake by 10:30 am
• Afternoon nap: Start around 1/1:30 pm and cap it by 3 pm.
• Bedtime: Aim for 7pm. If she’s not tired by 7 pm, a slightly later bedtime like 7:30 pm might suit her better at this stage.

This schedule should help balance her daytime sleep and create enough sleep pressure for a more consistent bedtime and night sleep.

4. Night sleep inconsistency

It’s completely normal for babies to have ups and downs with night sleep, especially during transitions like dropping a nap or hitting developmental milestones. If she’s waking twice some nights, it could be due to overtiredness from short naps or a late afternoon nap. Sticking to a consistent schedule and ensuring she’s not overtired at bedtime can help reduce night wakings over time.

If she’s waking and needing help to settle, you might consider gradually encouraging her to self-settle using a gentle method like shushing or patting in the crib. This can help her link sleep cycles more independently.

5. Humidifiers and sleep

I don’t find that humidifiers improve a little one’s sleep. But this is something you can discuss with your little one’s doctor, as they would be the best person to discuss this with.

Does this make sense?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Julia,

It sounds like you’re making some great progress, even though I know it might not feel like it right now with the disrupted nights. Transitioning out of the swaddle can be a tricky phase, especially when your little one is still learning to self-settle with their arms free. Let’s break this down and see how we can make things a bit smoother for both of you.

Firstly, you’re absolutely right to prioritise transitioning out of the swaddle now that your baby is nearly rolling. Keeping her arms free is essential for her safety, as rolling while swaddled can pose a suffocation risk since she wouldn’t be able to push herself up or adjust her position. Even though it’s tempting to delay, it’s better to persevere now rather than risk needing to make an emergency change later.

When babies transition out of the swaddle, they often struggle with the newfound freedom of movement. It’s common for them to startle themselves awake or accidentally hit themselves, which can disrupt their ability to self-settle. This is likely why she was able to self-settle with one arm in but is finding it harder now with both arms out. It’s a big adjustment, but it’s temporary – most babies adapt within a week or two with consistency and support.

What You Can Do Differently

Here are a few strategies to help her adjust and improve her sleep:

1. Use a Transitional Sleep Sack
   If you’re not already using one, a sleep sack designed for transitioning (like the ones with zip-off sleeves) can help. These provide a snug feeling around the torso while allowing her arms to move freely. Some babies find this comforting as it mimics the security of a swaddle.

2. Focus on Daytime Sleep
   You mentioned her naps are improving, which is fantastic! Keep working on extending her daytime sleep, as overtiredness can make night wakings more frequent and harder to manage.

3. Adjust Night Feeds Gradually
   Adding an extra feed during this transition is completely normal, as she might be seeking comfort or reassurance. Once she’s more settled with her arms out, you can work on reducing that extra feed by offering less milk or shortening the feeding time. Or you may find that once she gets comfortable and used to having both arms out she will natural drop that additional feed.

4. Stick to a Consistent Routine
   Babies thrive on predictability, so keep her bedtime routine consistent. This helps signal to her that it’s time to wind down and sleep, even if the transition feels rocky right now.

Remember: Most babies adapt to sleeping with their arms out within a week or two. It’s a tough phase, but you’re doing all the right things by giving her the opportunity to practice self-settling and supporting her when she needs it.

About Ferber

I completely understand why Ferber might feel too harsh at this stage. It’s not the only option, and you’re already using a gentler approach with the settling pyramid, which can be just as effective over time. The key is consistency and gradually reducing your involvement as she learns to settle herself.

Does this make sense?
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Kate,

This is such a fantastic update! I’m so glad to hear that adjusting her morning wake-up time has made such a difference. It sounds like you’ve really found a rhythm that works for her and for you!

Those longer night stretches must feel like such a relief. And it’s fantastic you’ve discovered a nap routine that doesn’t involve the bottle, this means she would be getting the opportunity to fall asleep on her own which will help her start linking those sleep cycles (it sounds like she is already doing this!)

Now, about the 4-month sleep regression – it’s a great question. The thing about the 4-month regression is that it’s not something that starts and then “ends” in the traditional sense. It’s actually a permanent change in how your baby sleeps. Between 3 – 5 months, their sleep matures, and they begin cycling through four stages of sleep, just like adults. This means they’re more likely to wake after one sleep cycle (about 45 minutes during naps or 2-3 hours at night) if they haven’t yet learned how to link those cycles independently.

What you were experiencing before – those disrupted nights and short stretches – could very well have been related to this sleep maturation process. But it sounds like the changes you’ve made to her schedule have helped her adjust beautifully. By ensuring her wake windows and naps are well-timed, and by avoiding an overtired or undertired state at bedtime, you’ve likely minimised the impact of this transition. So, while the “regression” itself doesn’t technically end, it seems like you’ve already navigated through the trickiest part of it!

If she’s now sleeping longer stretches at night and settling well for naps, I’d say you’re in a great place. The fact that she’s not waking after the first sleep cycle anymore is a strong sign that her day/night balance is spot on.

As for letting her go longer than six hours without a feed, I think it’s wise to check with your doctor, especially since every baby’s nutritional needs are different. But if she’s gaining weight well and seems content, she may naturally start stretching those feeds on her own.

Overall though she is doing so well.

Emma

p.s Leonard Cohen’s “Hallelujah” is such a beautiful song – I’d love that too!