Emma H
Forum Replies Created
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Hi Vivian!
It’s so good to hear you liked seeing the live example. I was hoping this would be helpful for parents, so I’m glad it is.
The settling pyramid is a responsive strategy that you can use to help your baby learn how to fall asleep on their own. Once your baby learns how to fall asleep independently, they won’t need to relearn this skill again. But if you accidentally fall into the habit where they need your help to fall asleep, then you will need to teach them how to fall asleep on their own again. For example, let’s say your baby gets a cold, and for the next week, every time they need to go to sleep (for naps and bedtime), you rock them in your arms until they fall asleep. If you do this, your baby will likely learn that they need to be rocked in your arms to fall asleep. In this situation, you will need to help your child relearn how to fall asleep while lying in their crib instead of being rocked in your arms.
You can use the settling pyramid at any age. In fact, just recently, I used this approach with a 13-month-old.
If you want to leave the room when you’re just watching and listening, that is okay. Some children over four months can get distracted and distressed if their parents are in the room. So, stepping out of the room may make it easier for these children to fall asleep. But if your little one signals to you that they need your help, go back into the room and move up and down the pyramid to provide them with the support they need.
Regarding your question about when the 4-month sleep regression typically ends, it doesn’t! The 4-month regression happens because your baby’s sleep has matured and this is a permanent change. They’re now cycling through 4 stages of sleep and may wake following one sleep cycle. Although the cause of the 4-month regression never ends, there are things that you can do to help your little one have longer naps during the day and sleep for longer stretches overnight. If you’re interested, these strategies are outlined in the pdf titled ‘The Complete Guide to Managing the 4 Month Regression’.
I recommend waiting until the early to mid-tired cues before putting him to bed. If you wait until the late tired cues, you may need to spend longer calming him back down before he is ready to lie down. Starting the routine when you see early to mid-tired cues will generally make it quicker and smoother.
Unfortunately, there is no specific age at which babies start to sleep for 10 – 12 hours overnight without needing a feed. It depends on the child and whether or not they’re breastfed or formula-fed. As a rough guide, bottle-fed babies can generally start having their night feeds phased out from around 6 months of age. Breastfed babies will often continue to wake for overnight feeds up until 12 months of age. But it can certainly happen earlier than this. It just depends on the baby.
Most babies over three months old need about 10 – 12 hours of sleep overnight. So, your eventual goal would be to have them sleep overnight without a feed for 10 – 12 hours. But as I just mentioned, this can take some time.
It sounds like your baby’s bedtime falls within a 30-minute window, which is fantastic, especially for his age! Even though his bedtime is not an exact time, falling within the same 30-minute window is what you aim for. To encourage him to continue to do this and help in the maturation of his circadian rhythm, I would recommend that you wake him up at the same time in the morning.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Nicole and George,
It sounds like your little one has a challenging start to life. It’s great that he is home with you, and I really hope the surgery in the not-too-distant future goes well.
I was just wondering if you have been able to work through the course and pick out things that you can do. It sounds like you have already created the ideal sleep environment for your little one, which is great! It also sounds like his overnight feeds are naturally reducing, which is also fantastic.
Unfortunately, his short naps are normal at this age, but there are some specific things that you can do to help extend these daytime naps. In the video Managing Catnaps, I discuss why these short naps occur, two approaches you can take, and more importantly, the strategies that you can use to extend those naps. Have you been able to watch this? If not, then it might be a good place to start.
One strategy you can work on is adopting the wake, feed, play, and sleep routine. Then, when your little one is tired and needs a nap, you could use the settling pyramid instead of feeding him off to sleep. This will help him learn to fall asleep without the bottle, which is key to extending the daytime naps. If you feel this is too difficult to do at this stage, you can just try to use the settling pyramid for the morning nap. You’ll be more likely to have success with this nap, as babies tend to find it easier to fall asleep for their first nap of the day.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Taylor,
It’s great that you have already worked out that your little one has a dairy/soy allergy and you have already eliminated it from your diet. Have you noticed a change in his fussiness and spitting up? Also, do you have a dietician or pediatrician helping you manage this allergy and the reflux?
Regarding your questions, when he spits up in the middle of the routine, if it’s a small spit-up, you can quickly wipe him and continue on with the routine. But if he spits up and needs a change, then change him and start the routine again by swaddling him, walking into the dark room with the sound machine on and rocking/shushing him, playing the lullaby, and then setting him down.
How long you rock him will depend on the situation. If he is upset, you may need to rock him a little longer before he calms down. You want to aim for him to be calm before you set him down.
It’s great that you have already started using the pyramid. It’s not unusual that they need a bit more help at the beginning as they get used to this new way of falling asleep. But with time, it should get better. Just follow your little one’s lead and provide him with the support he needs at this point in time. With time, he will start to notice the routine, and you will be able to settle him to sleep while he is lying down.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Hristina!
From your description, it sounds like your son may be staying awake after the feed (breastfeed or bottle) instead of falling asleep while eating, which is what he did during the newborn stage. If that is the case, then this is completely normal.
In the first few weeks, babies are often sleepy (and sleep a lot), but over the coming weeks, they start to ‘wake up’ and have more time awake during the day. If this is the case for your little one, then instead of following the wake, feed, sleep routine (which you did during those first three weeks), you will begin to adopt the wake, feed, play, and sleep routine.
To encourage your little one to fall asleep more quickly and for longer during the day, following the strategies in the course will help. So this includes (but is not limited to):
- Creating an ideal sleeping environment
- Considering swaddling him for all sleep
- Using the settling pyramid to help your little one fall asleep in the crib (when you have the energy to do so or just for the morning nap)
- Pausing when he stirs in his sleep to ensure he is genuinely awake before going in and getting him
- Following the wake, feed, play, sleep routine.
- Keeping stimulation low for overnight feeds
- Following the wake, feed, sleep routine for overnight feeds
- Think about having a consistent wake-up time to help the maturation of your little one’s circadian rhythm.
Just note that the length of time your little one will nap may vary for each nap (some might be long, while others may be short).
Also, remember that the Period of PURPLE Crying started at 2 weeks of age and will continue to increase, peaking at 6 – 8 weeks before it starts to decrease again. During these times of fussiness, consider using the other strategies in the module Nagitating the Period of PURPLE Crying.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Taylor,
Is it possible to make the routine shorter so your LO doesn’t fall asleep during the routine? Ideally, you want to place them in the crib awake and then help them fall asleep using the pyramid technique. If they fall asleep in your arms every time, then when they wake after one sleep cycle during naps, they’re likely to wake up fully because they’re no longer in your arms (the place they fell asleep). And during the night, they’re more likely to wake up more often in the second half of the night.
If your little one gets drowsy while you’re doing the routine, you can always cut it short and place them in the crib before they fall asleep. Is that possible?
If you do place your little one in the crib and climb to the top of the pyramid, picking them up, you have a few options:
-If you have the time and energy, you could settle them back down and try putting your little one back in the crib and descending the pyramid.
– If you have climbed to the top of the pyramid and don’t want to try again, you can rock them to sleep in your arms. If you choose to do this, gradually reduce the amount of hands-on strategies you’re applying while they’re in your arms. For example, when holding your little one in your arms, you could start rocking them while you pat their bottom and ‘shush’. Then, as they settle, you could stop rocking and just continue patting their bottom and shushing. If they remain calm, you could stop patting and just continue shushing until they fall asleep. Then, place them in the crib. Reducing the amount of movement will make it easier to move using the pyramid technique when you’re ready.
I hope that helps!
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Hi Vivian,
It’s so good to hear you enjoyed the course and you didn’t find my family too much 😂
Your little one will find it easier to fall asleep at bedtime if he is tired, so I recommend you wait until he is tired to put him to bed. Over the next few nights, you can record the time he falls asleep, which will let you know his actual bedtime and what time you should strive for.
For naps, I recommend starting the nap-time routine when he is showing early to mid-tired signs. The main thing is you want to avoid starting it when he is showing late, tired signs. This is because he will just take longer to settle down and then fall asleep (as you will need to calm him down first). The routine is a lot smoother if you start it when he is showing early to mid-tired signs.
It’s great that he has taken to the pacifier. If it does fall out and he cries, try to pause and give him the chance to fall asleep without it. If he continues to escalate, then pop it back in.
When babies first start to have longer stretches of sleep (which can happen around 6 weeks of age), the beginning of the night is the part that stretches first. So they tend to have a longer stretch of sleep at the beginning of the night. A dream feed can interrupt this long stretch of sleep, so I don’t feel dream feeds are necessary.
At this age, when people refer to sleeping through the night, they just mean the baby can sleep for 6 – 8 hours before waking for a feed. It’s not sleeping for 11 – 12 hours without a feed. In saying that, some babies will naturally sleep 10 – 11 hours without a feed, but most babies at this age will wake for 2 – 3 feeds overnight.
If he is still pooping overnight, then it’s important to change his diaper. You would just do this when he wakes for a feed. So when he wakes, you would follow the pattern of unswaddling, feeding, changing his diaper, swaddling, feeding, and then sleeping. You could also talk to the doctor about diaper creams to help prevent nappy rash.
Feeding 2 hourly during the day is fine. You should notice that this will start to lengthen over the next month.
Hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi JB & Jackie,
It sounds like you’re doing a great job! It’s so good to hear you had a great night last night.
Regarding your little one’s sleep, just because she is restless throughout the night and there is no pattern, I wonder if it’s due to the milk intolerance and this will resolve once she has been on the special formula for a few weeks. Can you check in with your pediatrician to find out if there is a timeline for this?
It’s great that you have been able to start using the pyramid technique for the morning nap and bedtime, and it’s great that your Nanny is on board, too. Feel free to let her watch this course, too, if you would like. This will help ensure you are all on the same page.
The Baby Merlin Sleep Suit isn’t something I tend to recommend because it is weighted and can pose a safety risk. It’s also not something the AAP recommend due to these safety concerns.
What you’re doing overnight sounds great. If needed, you can use the pyramid technique to help her fall asleep after a feed. But hopefully, she mainly falls asleep during the feed or while you hold her upright for a while due to the reflux. If you do need to settle her to sleep after a feed, you may have more success with the pyramid technique during the first half of the night (as she will be in deeper sleep). For the early morning hours, her sleep will be dominated by REM sleep, so you may need to revert to how you usually help her fall asleep at this point.
Regarding speeding up the maturation of her circadian rhythm, you sound like you are doing everything you possibly can. Unfortunately, she just needs time.
I really hope you have another great night of sleep!
Emma
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Hi Natalee,
It’s great that you have set up an ideal sleeping environment for your little one. I think it’s a great idea to take a gradual approach and start with the first nap of the day in the crib.
When you say you’re currently getting him drowsy and settled in your arms and then putting him in the crib, are you using the settling pyramid once you place him in the crib? If you are, I would expect that the first few days that you use this approach, your little one will need more help from you to fall asleep, as he is used to napping in your arms and is learning a new way to fall asleep.
In terms of how long to persist with this method, if you have the energy, I would try it for 20 minutes (as it can take babies up to 20 minutes to fall asleep). If he still won’t settle to sleep, then settle him to sleep the way you usually do.
To increase the likelihood of success with falling asleep in the crib remember the following:
– Make sure he is genuinely tired when you offer a nap. Every baby’s sleep requirement over 24 hours differs, so following wake windows alone isn’t always accurate. So remember to combine age-appropriate wake windows with your baby’s tired signs and the general pattern to help you figure out when he needs a nap. I often find that tired signs look very similar to ‘I’m bored’ signs. Sometimes, I find it helpful to switch up the activity or the scenery when you first see the ‘tired signs’ to help figure out if they are tired versus just bored. If he continues to fuss/complain after you have made these changes, then it’s a sign he is tired. If he stops fussing, it’s more likely that he was bored.
– Do a nap routine even if you plan for him to nap in your arms/pram or car. A quick and consistent nap routine will signal to your baby that sleep is coming and it’s time to wind down.
– Remember, any amount of sleep in the crib is a win! You should notice that the naps will get longer as your baby becomes more familiar with sleeping in his crib.
– If he wakes from a nap, you can try resetting him back to sleep, but this can be tricky. That little rest he just had might have taken the edge off his sleepiness, meaning he might not feel tired enough to go back to sleep. So if you’ve been trying to get him back to sleep for about 10-15 minutes and it’s not working, it’s okay to just to end the nap there and start the next wake window.
I hope that answers your question!
Emma
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Hi Anastasia,
You can totally keep going with contact naps. Those cuddles while they sleep are so precious!
Just make sure if you plan to let your little one sleep on you, you still do the pre-sleep routine and make sure that last step is calming (e.g you might sing a lullaby while you hold him in your arms). By completing the pre-sleep routine before he falls asleep, you will be creating a sleep cue for your little one and this sleep cue can then be used when you want him to nap in a crib or a safe sleep space.
Also if you feel up to it, I would recommend give him 1 opportunity a day to practice falling asleep in the crib or sleep space. The morning nap will always be the easiest. By doing this you’re allowing him to develop the skills necessary to fall asleep independently (with you applying the settling pyramid of course!).
Enjoy those cuddles!
Emma
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That’s great you had another great night!
Yep, it’s very typical for babies to wake during their sleep. If they are tired and nothing is bothering them, the hope is they will fall back to sleep independently, which it sounds like your little one did.
This is great!
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That’s great!
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No worries!
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That’s a great win!
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Hi Jaime,
You can continue with your pattern of wake, play, feed, play, and then sleep if you feel that is giving your little one more time between feeds and leading to larger feeds. The main thing is to separate the feed from the nap. This reduces the chances your little one will fall asleep while feeding and develop a sleep association with feeding.
It’s also a good idea to schedule the feed more than 30 minutes before nap time. This is because there’s a bowel reflex that occurs around 20 – 30 minutes after eating. So by scheduling the feed more than 30 minutes before nap time, you’re reducing the chances your little one will need to poop when you’re trying to settle them to sleep or during sleep (which will lead to them having a shorter nap).
Have you had a chance to watch the video on managing catnaps? In it, I give some strategies for overcoming the catnapping phase.
Once your little one starts to extend their naps, you might want to change the pattern to wake, feed, play, and then sleep, as the time between the feeds will be longer.
I hope that helps!
Emma
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Hi Jaime,
Nope! Do continue using it during his fussy period while he is awake and playing. As sucking is extremely soothing for them at this age.
Emma