[Emma H]

Hi Laura,

It’s great to hear that you think you’ve navigated through the breastfeeding crisis and the regression! And you’re feeling ready to take on more things around sleep when life is already extremely busy.

I’ve just answered your questions below.

Daytime Sleep Schedule

Great work pushing that first wake window to 1 hour 30 minutes! And yes, continuing to nudge it very gradually towards 9:00am is exactly the right approach. There’s no rush, even 5 minutes every few days is perfect.

To answer your question about the goal schedule, yes, you’re on the right track! You’re aiming for something roughly like this:

• First nap: around 9:00 – 10:30
• Second nap: around 12:30 – 14:00
• Third nap: around 16:00 – 16:45 (a shorter catnap)
• Bedtime: around 19:30

Now, regarding total sleep if she’s consistently getting around 10 hours overnight, then yes, you’d want to make sure she’s getting enough daytime sleep to meet her overall needs. Around 3 to 3.5 hours of daytime sleep is a reasonable target, with the longer naps in the morning and midday and a shorter one in the afternoon.

Your observation about bedtime is really useful! The pattern you’re noticing, that a later bedtime of around 20:30 results in her sleeping closer to 7:00am, while an earlier bedtime of 19:30 leads to waking around 5:00 – 5:30, suggests that a slightly later bedtime might actually suit her better right now, given her 10-hour overnight sleep tendency.

With that in mind, aiming for a bedtime closer to 20:30 could work really well. However, the gap between her third nap ending at around 16:45 and an 20:30 bedtime is quite long, so you may find she gets overtired trying to bridge that stretch. If that happens, there are a couple of things you could try:

Option 1: Add a short fourth catnap to help her comfortably reach that later bedtime. Even just 20–30 minutes can be enough to take the edge off and prevent her from becoming overtired.

Option 2: Shift her second nap slightly later to around 13:00 – 15:00, which would then push her third nap to around 17:00 – 17:30. That shorter gap between her last nap and bedtime might make reaching 20:30 much more manageable without needing a fourth nap.

Independent Sleep

First of all, the progress you made before the crisis hit was fantastic. Getting to a point where she was falling asleep without the breast almost 100% of the time is a huge achievement, so please don’t feel like you’ve lost that. She learned it once, and she’ll learn it again, often even faster the second time around!

What you’re doing right now sounds like exactly the right approach. Gradually reducing the breast-to-sleep association, starting with nighttime, and allowing her those few minutes of comfort sucking before unlatching, that’s a really gentle and effective way to do it. The fact that she’s accepting the unlatch and then settling with caressing or patting is a really positive sign.

For the naps, the same gradual approach applies and it sounds like she’s already responding well, with only about a minute of protest before settling with rocking. That’s great progress! The only thing I would suggest is that when you are rocking her to sleep, try to stop that rocking before she falls asleep. This will help her fall asleep without movement, and then make it easier to progress to using that settling pyramid to help her fall asleep.

The Clinginess

The increased clinginess could be related to the changes you’re making with breastfeeding but it could also be connected to where she is developmentally right now.

At this age, she’s becoming much more aware of her surroundings and is starting to notice when you’re nearby and when you’re not. On top of that, she’s likely at that frustrating stage where she can roll and move a little, but can’t quite get to the toys she wants or do as much as she’d like with them. That combination of wanting to do more but not being able to yet can make little ones extra clingy, because you’re her safe base while she’s figuring it all out!

Regardless of the cause, this is usually just a phase. It tends to settle as she adjusts to the changes with breastfeeding, builds confidence with her new ways of falling asleep, and develops more independence with her movement and play.

Does that make sense?
Emma

• This reply was modified 1 month ago by  Emma H.

[Emma H]

Hi Laura,

Sorry, I’m a little confused about what you mean by “random wake windows,” so I just want to clarify, are her wake windows changing throughout the whole day, as in they’re decreasing across the board? Or are you referring specifically to that first wake window of the day starting to become shorter? Or is it the final wake window before bed that was three hours and is now reducing?

The easiest thing to do would be if you could just update me on what her full routine is currently looking like so I can get a clearer picture.

In terms of bedtime and waking 45 minutes later, there are a couple of possible reasons for this:

1. She’s not quite tired enough – she might have enough sleep pressure to fall asleep, but not enough to actually stay asleep.
2. Something is disturbing her – it’s worth thinking about what’s happening around the house at that time and whether something might be accidentally waking her up.
3. Rolling – I’m not quite sure how you’re settling her to sleep in the crib, whether that’s on her back or her tummy. But if she’s falling asleep on her back and then rolling onto her tummy during her sleep, that could be what’s causing her to wake 45 minutes later. If that is the case, something to consider is whether you start settling her to sleep on her tummy. A lot of babies actually find that once they can roll over, they prefer to sleep on their tummy. If you do decide to try this, you just want to make sure her sleep space is safe, meaning free from any loose items.

The easiest way to figure out whether it’s a tiredness issue is if you can tell me what her daytime routine looks like. Would that be okay?

Thanks,
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Pav,

Offering him a slightly earlier nap on these days would be fine and letting him sleep for slightly longer as a result would be a good idea. Just based on your initial recording if he slept past 2:30pm he tended to fall asleep after 8pm. So I would just make sure you cap the nap at 2:30pm.

I would also be keen to see what this week looks like, as I am interested if Roh starts waking up independently from the majority of naps and mornings. If he is still needing to be woken then we might need to tweak the length of his naps to make them slightly longer. As generally if a bub is getting enough sleep they wake up on their own, so if he isn’t then it could suggest we need to give him the opportunity to have a longer nap.

Does this make sense?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Lizzie,

It sounds like you’ve been trying a lot of different things, and I can hear it feels like it’s getting harder rather than easier. But I do want to point out, the fact that your little one can now fall asleep in your arms without movement is a huge step forward from where you started.

I have a few changes I’d recommend trying. I’ve broken them down below so they’re easier to work through.

1. Move the Nappy Change Earlier in Her Wake Window

Rather than changing her nappy as part of the nap or bedtime routine, try doing it earlier – ideally shortly after a feed or midway through her play time. Most babies, especially newborns, really dislike nappy changes, and if she’s already tired, it becomes one more thing she has to push through before sleep. That frustration can tip her over the edge before you’ve even started settling.

If her nappy is only slightly wet at nap time, that’s okay, with barrier cream on, it shouldn’t bother her. Of course, if she’s done a poo, you’ll still need to change it.

2. Start the Routine Outside the Bedroom

If she’s becoming distressed as soon as you begin the bedtime or nap routine in the bedroom, try starting parts of it in the living room to break that association. Here’s what that could look like:

• Put the swaddle on in the living room.
• Read the book out there too.
• Walk around the living room while patting her so she’s calm in your arms. You could also pop the dummy in at this point to help her settle.
• Once she’s calm, walk into the bedroom, turn off the lights, and sing the lullaby in the semi-dark.
• Then try laying her down in the crib and start the settling pyramid.

Sometimes just changing up the routine slightly is enough to reduce the distress they start to associate with certain environments.

3. Focus the Settling Pyramid on the First Nap and Bedtime

During the newborn phase, you’re most likely to get success with the settling pyramid at the first nap of the day and at bedtime. As the day goes on and sleep pressure shifts, the consecutive naps tend to get harder to settle. So if you can’t get there with every nap, that’s completely okay – just prioritise that first nap and bedtime, and keep giving her the opportunity to try.

4. Consider Introducing the Dummy Earlier in the Routine

I know you were keen to hold off on the dummy, but it’s very common during the newborn phase for babies to suck to sleep and using the dummy earlier in the routine might actually make it easier for her to transition from your arms into the crib.

Here’s one approach you could try:

• Offer the dummy from the beginning of the routine and let her use it while you work through the settling pyramid in the crib.
• Just before she falls asleep, try gently popping the dummy out – place your middle finger between the dummy and the corner of her mouth and ease it out.
• Some babies will do that final step of falling asleep on their own without it. Others will wake up more, and you’ll need to leave it in.

This gives you a way to get her used to settling in the crib first, whether the dummy stays in or comes out. If she does need it in, we can work on removing it later, the priority right now is just getting that crib settling established.

One Last Thing to Keep in Mind

With newborns, the window between tired and overtired is very short – they can escalate quickly. So if she tips into that overtired zone despite your best efforts, that’s normal. Ideally, you’d aim to start the routine a little earlier, but it’s not always possible to catch it in time, and that’s okay.

Does that make sense?

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Annie,

No worries at all. I was hoping you were busy putting everything into practice! It’s great to hear you’ve made some progress. Regarding your questions, I have answered them below.

Early Morning Wake-Ups

Since he’s been waking around 6–6:30 and isn’t really interested in playing during that first wake window, I’d suggest trying to feed him when he wakes and get him back to sleep until 7:30.

I wouldn’t let him sleep past 7:30 though, because with a 7:30 bedtime, that would mean 12+ hours of overnight sleep and most babies only do around 10–12 hours. So try feeding him at that early wake, settling him back to sleep, and then waking him at 7:30 to start the day. See how that goes over the next few days.

Daytime Settling

It’s really common for babies to start protesting when they recognise the sleep routine. One thing that can help is mixing it up slightly. For example, put his swaddle on in the living room instead of the bedroom. Walk around and pat him until he’s calm, and then go into the bedroom to sing the lullaby. That small change can sometimes reduce the resistance.

I also wanted to ask, have you been able to put him down in the crib and settle him to sleep using the settling pyramid for naps yet, or is he falling asleep in your arms? And if he is, how have you gone, reducing the rocking so he’s falling asleep without movement?

If you are trying the settling pyramid and he’s protesting a lot, what you can do is do a more gradual approach. By that, I mean you would do your nap routine, sing that lullaby, rock him a few moments in your arms. Then, when he’s calm, you would place him in the crib but immediately you would start patting him or you could even place your hand on his chest or underneath his bottom and start rocking him to the side. Then you gradually stop that rocking movement, continuing to shush him and keep your hand on his bottom or his chest. Then, if he stays calm, remove your hand and just shush in sight and then out of sight. Sometimes, going from the top of the pyramid down as soon as you place him in the crib can make that transition a little bit easier.

Overnight Settling

It’s fantastic that you’ve cut down those overnight feeds. It makes complete sense that he settles easily after feeds in the first half of the night but is harder to resettle later on, that’s because babies are in deeper sleep earlier in the night and lighter sleep in the second half, which makes those later wake-ups trickier.

Does that make sense?

Emma

[Emma H]

No worries Pav. Let me know how this week goes.
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Olga,

It really depends on your little one. So if you like it, it’d be great if you could let me know the time he generally naps during the day and how long these naps are and how many naps he’s having. Then I can work out if it might be too much sleep.

Emma

• This reply was modified 3 weeks ago by  Emma H.

[Emma H]

Hi Yanet!

It’s great that you’ve been able to stop the motion and your little one is now falling asleep without movement!

In terms of transitioning to the settling pyramid, here are a few things I’d suggest trying.

Adjusting the Sleep Routine

Because she’s getting distressed during the routine, try completing part of it outside the bedroom. For example, you could put her sleeping bag on in the living room and start singing the lullaby as you walk around outside the bedroom. Once she’s calm, walk into the bedroom, sing the lullaby one more time through, and then lay her down in the crib.

If she starts to escalate as soon as you enter the room, that’s okay, just continue singing the lullaby as you walk in and place her straight into the crib.

Tweaking the Settling Pyramid

Because she’s escalating to a cry as soon as you place her down, rather than starting at the bottom of the pyramid (watch and listen), I’d suggest starting higher up. Once she’s in the crib, place your hands on either side of her body (or one hand on her chest) and gently rock her side to side while shushing. This gives her some of that movement she’s seeking and lets her know you’re right there. Once she starts to settle, gradually reduce the rocking and begin descending the pyramid. This will likely be a much easier transition for her than starting from the bottom and working your way up, since she’s going straight to the top anyway.

Early Morning Waking

If she’s waking at 5:45am and not going back to sleep, try offering her a feed first. Sometimes a feed at that time is enough to help them drift back off. If she doesn’t go back to sleep after the feed, continue to treat it like a night waking, keep the lights off, avoid talking or stimulating her, and try to resettle her.

Also make sure the room is very dark (dark enough that you can’t read a book), as any early morning light creeping in can signal to her body that it’s time to wake up. Using white noise continuously throughout the night will also help mask any household noises in the early hours that might be waking her.

One More Thing

If the early waking continues, we may need to look at her overall sleep schedule and honestly, this is something I’m interested in regardless, because it might help us make the settling pyramid attempts more successful. When you have time, could you let me know what her routine currently looks like? Specifically: what time she wakes in the morning, what time her naps are and how long they last, and what time bedtime is. This will help me see how much sleep she’s getting across the day and whether any adjustments could help with both the settling pyramid and the early morning wakes.

I hope this helps!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Olga,

I hope you’re having a great week I have answered your question below.

Wake-up time of 9:30–10:00 AM

The specific time you choose doesn’t matter nearly as much as being consistent with it. The key is picking a 30-minute window and waking him within that window every single day, including weekends. This consistency is what helps your baby’s circadian rhythm develop properly, which in turn leads to more predictable naps, smoother bedtimes, and longer stretches of sleep overnight.

So if 9:30–10:00 AM works for your family right now, that’s absolutely fine. Just keep in mind that a later wake-up time means his entire schedule – naps and bedtime – will shift later too. So you’d be looking at a fairly late bedtime. If at any point you’d prefer an earlier bedtime, the way to achieve that is by gradually shifting his wake-up time earlier, about 15 minutes every 3 days, and his whole schedule will follow.

Wide awake after a night feed

At 7 weeks, your baby’s circadian rhythm is only just beginning to develop, so it’s normal for him to sometimes seem alert after a night feed. The goal is to teach him that nighttime is for sleeping, not playing. You do this through how you respond and the environment you create:

• Keep the room as dark as possible during the feed (use a dim red light if needed)
• Keep all interactions minimal and boring – no talking, no eye contact, no stimulation
• Don’t change his nappy unless it’s dirty or he seems uncomfortable
• After the feed, place him back down. If he’s alert but calm, leave him be. The dark, boring environment will help signal to his brain that it’s not time to be awake

If you’re doing all of the above and he’s still regularly wide awake after night feeds, it’s worth looking at how much he’s sleeping during the day. If his daytime naps are very long, he may be getting too much daytime sleep and essentially “borrowing” from his nighttime sleep. In that case, you may need to cap some of his daytime naps to ensure he has enough sleep pressure to sleep for longer stretches overnight.

Going from 5–6 hour stretches back to 2–3 hours

To encourage longer stretches to return:

• Make sure he’s getting full feeds during the day (not snacking). If he’s falling asleep mid-feed, try gently waking him to finish
• Ensure his daytime naps aren’t excessively long – if he’s sleeping for very long stretches during the day, that sleep is being “borrowed” from nighttime
• Keep that consistent morning wake-up time, as this supports his developing circadian rhythm

As long as you’re keeping things consistent, those longer stretches should return.

I hope that makes sense.

Emma

• This reply was modified 3 weeks, 3 days ago by  Emma H.

[Emma H]

Hi Pav,

I’ve had a look at your record for the last week, and there’s some really positive progress! It looks like the split nights are happening much less often now, which is great to see.

I did notice that he’s been waking a little earlier than usual, closer to 6:30 rather than 7. So it might be worth adjusting bedtime slightly over the next week to see if that helps push his wake-up time back.

Here’s what I’d suggest:

On short nap days: Offer an earlier bedtime, aim for around 7:00pm (lay him in his crib at 7pm), or even a touch earlier if he’s really cranky.

On longer nap days (around 2 hours): Put him in the crib at 7:15pm.

Then just keep an eye on two things over the next week:

1. How long it takes him to fall asleep at night
2. Whether his morning wake-up time starts shifting closer to 7:00am

This should give us a clearer picture of what’s working and whether those early wakes start to settle!

Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Lizzie,

Great to hear you’re going to try the Halo swaddles – experimenting with one arm up is a good idea too.

Regarding yawning as a sleep cue – yawning is usually a late tired sign, but given that your little one seems to perk up when you take her into the bedroom, what I’d suggest is this: when you see that yawn, instead of getting her ready for bed straight away, try changing up the activity first and see how she responds. If she perks up and re-engages, that’s a good indication she was just bored, and you can let her continue playing. But if she continues to fuss or just becomes a bit grizzly, then you know she’s genuinely tired and it’s time to start the bedtime routine.

Does that make sense?
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Yanet,

If she’s closing her eyes while you rock her, she’s likely falling asleep or entering a light stage of sleep. Here are two things you can try:

Gradually reduce the rocking Rather than rocking her until she’s fully still, try shortening the rocking time. Since she responds better when you slow down gradually, use that to your advantage – slowly reduce the speed of the rocking so she doesn’t notice the change. The goal is for her to be calm but not fully asleep when you stop, so she gets used to falling asleep without motion.

Adjust your arm position before the transfer This small change can make a big difference. When you’re holding her, her head is probably resting in the crook of your elbow, with your other arm supporting under her body. Before you lower her into the crib, reposition like this:

1. Move the arm that’s under her body so that your hand is now supporting the back of her head.
2. Slide the arm that was under her head down so it’s now supporting the middle of her back.
3. Lower her into the crib legs first – so her legs touch the mattress, then her bottom, then her back, then her head.
4. Once she’s lying down, slowly slide each hand out to the side (rather than pulling them straight out from under her).

This creates a much smoother, less jerky movement during the transfer reduces the chances of startling her.

Does that make sense?
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Yanet!

I have answered your questions below.

How long to see results?

Every baby is different, so there’s no exact timeline. Some parents notice progress within a few days, while for others it takes a couple of weeks of consistent practice. The key is consistency rather than speed, even small signs of progress (like needing slightly less rocking or calming more quickly in your arms) are steps in the right direction.

When to progress from eyes closed in your arms to placing her down awake

It sounds like your little one has made some really nice progress, falling asleep without being rocked is a big step, and it shows she’s adjusting to this new way of falling asleep really quickly.

I’d suggest continuing what you’re doing for another day or two – letting her fall asleep without movement in your arms – just so it becomes more consistent for her. Then, for the morning nap and bedtime, you could try this:

1. Complete your nap/bedtime routine and end with your lullaby while gently rocking her.
2. Once the lullaby finishes, give her a few gentle pats, and then lay her down in the crib.

If she starts to fuss as soon as you place her down, here’s a small modification to the settling pyramid that might help: instead of patting her tummy, place your hands on her tummy and gently rock her while she’s in the crib. This gives her a little bit of that movement she’s used to, but in the crib rather than in your arms. Then, once she’s staying calm, gradually slow the rocking down and slowly take your hands away.

This can be a much easier bridge for babies who are used to movement, so it’s definitely worth trying.

The grunting, squirming and fussing during the routine

You’re right, this is very likely her way of “powering down.” Many babies do this as they transition from being awake to feeling sleepy. It’s completely normal. It can look and sound like she’s uncomfortable or fighting it, but it’s actually her body winding down.

You don’t need to avoid it or fix it, just continue calmly with the routine. Over time, as she becomes more familiar with the sleep routine and learns to fall asleep more independently, you’ll likely notice this fussing reduces.

Does that make sense?
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Aikaterini,

Thanks so much for taking the time to provide such detailed answers, it really has helped me understand what’s happening!

It’s great that your little one has been on the right formula for over six weeks now, and that you’re seeing those longer stretches of sleep. The fact that he’s generally happier during the day and eating well is fantastic!

Him getting upset when the bedtime routine starts

This could mean one of two things:

1. He’s not quite tired enough yet. If that’s the case, try stretching his wake windows from 2 hours to 2 hours and 15 minutes, or even 2 and a half hours, and see if that helps.
2. He’s starting to figure out what the routine means – basically, he’s worked out that the routine leads to sleep, and he’s protesting before you even get started! If he’s still falling asleep fairly quickly once you’re in the room, this is likely what’s going on.

If it’s the second one, here’s a small tweak that can help: do part of the routine outside the bedroom. For example, put his sleeping bag on outside the room, gently rock him in your arms while you sing a lullaby, and wait until he’s calm before you go into the dark room. Then sing the lullaby one more time and place him in the cot. This little break in the routine helps reduce that initial fight, and over time you can move everything back into the bedroom.

His short naps

You’re absolutely right to adjust his routine and naps based on how long his previous nap was, and to follow his sleep cues. If he’s only napping for 20–30 minutes, he will need quite a few naps during the day, which is normal for now.

The key to helping him take longer naps (and reduce those overnight wakes) is practising the settling pyramid so he learns to fall asleep more independently. I’d suggest focusing on using it for the first nap of the day, maybe the second if you have time, and at bedtime.

If he naps in the pram or in your arms

That’s absolutely fine! Just try to still do part of the routine — for example sing the lullaby before popping him in the pram or holding him.

• In the pram at home: Try gradually slowing the pram down so he falls asleep with less and less movement. (When you’re out on a walk, just enjoy the walk, that’s important for your wellbeing too!)
• In your arms: Try this gradual approach- rock him while patting, then stop rocking but keep patting, then stop patting so you’re standing completely still. The goal is for him to fall asleep in your arms without any movement. This helps him get used to falling asleep without that extra input, which will make the transition to using the settling pyramid for all naps much easier down the track.

His overnight wakes

It’s fantastic that he has a consistent bedtime and is sleeping through until around 3am – that’s a really good stretch!

At this age (and really under 6 months), it’s very normal for babies, even formula-fed ones, to have that longer initial stretch of sleep and then wake once or twice for a feed. So feeding him at 3 or 3:30am is absolutely fine.

If he’s waking again about 2 hours later, it might be worth considering whether you’re comfortable feeding him a second time. I know that feels like a lot, but as he learns to fall asleep more independently, that first stretch of sleep will naturally get longer. Eventually, he’ll only need one feed before morning, and then over time, he won’t need any overnight feeds at all.

For formula-fed babies, it’s quite common for them to still need an overnight feed up until around 6 months of age, so what you’re experiencing is completely normal!

Does that make sense?
Emma

[Emma H]

Hi Catherin,

A based on my calculations, your little one may be 15 months or nearly 15 months, so she actually doesn’t need that breastfeed for nutrition anymore. Since she’s only having it at bedtime, it indicates that it is a sleep association. Once you remove it, she will start sleeping for longer stretches overnight and sleep through.

There are a few different ways you can approach this.

Option 1: Get your husband to take over bedtime

Since your little one is already settling well at childcare without a feed, your husband can complete your usual bedtime routine and then either lay her down in the crib and copy what daycare does to get her to go to sleep or use that settling pyramid. Because she won’t associate your husband with breastfeeding, she’s much less likely to protest.

Option 2: Switch from breast to bottle (then gradually water it down)

This one works really well because it gently removes the feed without going cold turkey.

• Start by expressing your milk and offering it in a bottle at bedtime. Once she’s accepted the bottle, you gradually water the milk down over about 13 days:
• Days 1–3: 100% milk, 0% water
• Days 4–6: 75% milk, 25% water
• Days 7–9: 50% milk, 50% water
• Days 10-12: 25% milk, 75% water
• Days 13+: Just water

What usually happens is that as the milk gets more watered down, they lose interest in the bottle altogether and just stop wanting it!

A quick tip – if your husband can be the one giving the bottle, it’ll be easier because your little one associates you with breastfeeding. If it needs to be you, wear a tight-fitting top so she can’t easily lift your shirt, and let her see you put the milk into the bottle so she knows it’s the same milk.

Option 3: Keep nursing but move it earlier in the routine

If you’d prefer to keep breastfeeding for now, you can move the feed earlier in the bedtime routine so she’s no longer falling asleep on the breast.

Here’s how:

• Nurse her while standing up and gently rocking (this keeps her slightly less drowsy than lying down)
• When she starts to slow down, slip your finger between her lips and your nipple to gently break the seal
• Continue rocking and patting her in your arms
• Once she’s calm, stop rocking but keep patting
• Then either let her fall asleep in your arms or transfer her to the crib

Does that make sense?
Emma