[Monica Schischka]

Thank you so much Emma! I have already started to implement the tweaks to her nap times, bed time & she did wake up around 6am this morning – so we’ll see how tonight goes. Her naps ran pretty much almost right to the schedule you suggested.

The last two night she has slept pretty well actually which has been great. The first night she fell asleep within about 5 mins of being put down, and woke only twice in the night for feeds. Last night she was kickin about in bed for a while so I went in to feed her just before 8pm, then she only woke once in the night for a feed.

Tonight putting her down she was rolling around for half an hour, so I went in at 7.45 to feed her so she wouldn’t fall asleep too late.

What would you recommend for the last feed- because it is bedtime, does it still need to be at least 30mins before she goes down? Or perhaps if I fed her in the lounge after her pjs are on, she might hunker down for a decent feed before going into the bedroom…? She is at that FOMO age of wanting to look around quite a lot when feeding. The good thing about feeding her once she’s been in the bedroom for a while is she just gets straight down to business.

If she does get put down & then kicks about on the bed, is there a time limit I should set before going in to feed her (if necessary)?

Thanks again. I will start noting down how often I need to go feed her after being put down for the night.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by  Monica Schischka.

[Monica Schischka]

Hi Emma – thank you so much for your response.

To answer your questions:

• Her bedtime does vary. I try to keep it pretty close to 7pm, but it might sometimes be 7.30 or 8pm depending on when she last woke up from her final nap. Sometimes if her final nap is a little earlier I will stretch out her final wake window to 3hrs or maybe even 3.5hrs for a 7pm bedtime.
• Wake ups – Sometimes she might wake to feed at 4.50am then rustle around in bed till about 6.30am when she will fall asleep again for an hour or two. Fairly often she does still wake up around 6am-6.30am, sometimes 7am.

• She ends up sleeping in all sorts of positions these days. She rolls around A LOT when she goes down. Sometimes it might take her a while to fall asleep, and I can see on the monitor she does a lot of rolling & inch-worming around the bed or the cot (cot for day naps, big bed with me for night sleep). She falls asleep on tummy, back, or side. Over the past week she has quite often wriggled her way over to me in the night where she is snuggled in quite close – I’m not sure if it’s from getting cold in the night, or “smelling milk” (?), or just wanting to snuggle with mama. When I put her back over to her side I put a few blankets on her for warmth and that seems to work.

• Yes her bedtime routine is the same. For the night time routine I have also added at the start putting on her night nappy & getting her into her pj’s. I get her to choose out of two different coloured pyjamas which one she wants. This differentiates the night time sleep from the daytime naps. For the feeds I feed when she wakes. Sometimes I will feed an hour or half hour before she goes back down. If she hasn’t had much of a feed before her night sleep, she often wakes after an hour or so, I go in, keep everything dark, keep the white noise on, feed her (she usually falls asleep), put her back on the bed & leave.

• Her last nap time varies – as some days all her naps are 45mins-1hr, other days she has an hour & a half with two 50min naps (or a long nap & two short ones), some of her naps have been getting long recently – 2hrs45, 2hrs15, 2hrs. So the naps are a bit all over the place depending on how long each one is. Final nap times have varied from 3.30pm, 5.15pm, 3.50pm, 5pm, sometimes even a bit later. If the nap has been quite late, she will kick around on the bed after being put down for the night sometimes for an hour or so. Generally she is pretty happy and eventually falls asleep, or eventually cries so I will feed her, then she will sleep.

• When I feed her in the night I have my phone on the bedside table. I flick the phone flashlight on, but it is face down – so the light is very muffled by the table surface. I do that when I pick her up and put her down so I can see a little. Sometimes I have the light off completely during feeding. I’m not sure she wakes up really during the night feeds – I don’t really let her get too restless/upset to a point where she might fully wake – but sometimes in the early morning feeds I think she is kind of half awake when she rustles around for an hour or so after a feed (aka 4.30/5am-6/6.30am).

• The last few nights the longest stretch of sleep has been 3hrs, and she is waking around 5 times in the night.

Two days ago (Sunday): slept 6.38am-7.28am, 50mins

First nap- 9.40-10.30am, 50mins

Second nap- 1.30-3.30pm, 2hrs

Bedtime- 7.06pm-8pm first wake-feed, 54mins

Second sleep period- 8.08pm-10.11pm, 2h3m

Third sleep period- 10.22-1.22am, 3hrs<div>

Fourth sleep period- 1.34-3.33am, 1h59m

Fifth sleep period- 3.44-4.55am, 1h11m

Final sleep period- 5.05-6.06am, 1h1m</div><div>

She used to sleep nice long stretches and only wake up twice in the night for feeds. If I try and pat & shush her in the night to calm her she just starts to cry more – so I feed her. For a short period around the time I first messaged you, she was waking additionally in the night and I was able to pat her back to sleep without a feed. This seems to be different.

But then last week (Thursday) this was the sleep-wake:

Final night sleep: 5.32-6.20am, 48mins

First nap: 8.11-9.39am, 1h27m

Second nap: 11.56-12.46, 50m

Third nap: 2.52-3.52pm, 1hr

Bedtime: 6.41pm-12.13am, 5h32m sleep

Second sleep period: 12.26-3.08am, 2h42m

Third sleep period: 3.21-6.01am, 2h39m

So the nights and days really are kind of all over the place. The most consistent I can try for is her bedtime, but sometimes she is still awake for an hour or so after being put down.

Before the change her night sleep was generally bedtime 6.50pm-ish, she would sleep till around midnight or 1am, wake for a feed, sleep, then wake again maybe at 3 or 4am, maybe 4.30am, then sleep again till about 6.20am. She has not had a night like that since the 8th of December.

Thank you so much. I am eager to hear your insights on this!

</div>

[Monica Schischka]

Emma! Oh my goodness…I implemented your recommendations and after one day of staying the course, by the second day bubba went down an absolute treat! Ever since then putting her down has been such a piece of cake- I do the routine, put her down and leave the room. She has been sleeping well during the day and getting herself to sleep fine. The wake windows are from 2hrs to 2.5hrs

For the past week-and-a-bit there have been some changes however with her night sleep. She has been having the initial long stretch once being put down but the maximum length of this sleep is now only about 4hours. After that there is another wake after 2 or 3 hours (varies between the two), then another wake after only an hour or two hours (again- varies between the two).

I am unable to settle her after the short wakes without a feed- as instead of just rustling around in the night previously, she now cries, and can not be calmed or settled unless fed. I had a visit with Plunket on Friday and the nurse suggested starting solids, as it sounds like she’s hungry. My little one is not quite yet 5 months. Before starting solids for her, I thought I would check with you in case there is anything I can change in her routine to achieve longer night sleep stretches, if it is not due to hunger. I have also upped her feeds since Friday to see if this might help.

She is very active, not teething- at least, has no teeth yet. Was born quite big, so her growth on the ‘growth charts’ has been slow (she has gone down a few percentiles- but has always put on weight, not lost any). Generally always very happy, I have no concerns. She has always eyed up my food since day one 😂 so I’m not sure that would be a marker for being ready for solids.

Her neck strength is good & she can sit up if I pull her up with her hands. She does make mouth movements when watching me eat, and will not go back to her own activities until I have finished eating (if she is able to see me).

Is bubba too hungry to sleep? Thanks.

[Monica Schischka]

Thanks for your reply Emma. Yeah it was a bit of a triple whammy….coming back home after spending 5 weeks with family, and then she had her 3 month imms a few days later, then the sleep got all mucked up and I have no family or friend network where I live- so it has been challenging for sure.

1. I’ve only been properly tracking her sleep the past few days, but generally she wakes up around 6ish. Sometimes it’s that 5am unsettled period, but often I’ll feed her to sleep next to me then she’ll go back to sleep again till 7 or 8ish. The past few days looks like around 6.30 seems to be a common wake-up.

2. It’s only in the past week I’ve been starting implementing the wake, feed, play, sleep routine. A few times in the last two days I have also fed her before a sleep, as she was displaying signs of hunger and was having meltdowns when putting her down- giving her a feed seemed to settle her and get her to sleep. I think with having the longer wake times she was getting a bit hungrier…?? Also I think if I give her a feed before the midday/early afternoon nap then she ends up having a longer sleep for that one.

3. She is having 3-4 naps a day. Usually they are around 40-50 minutes, with one long one around 1h40-2h20ish. Sometimes only 30mins long, but generally around the 40-45min mark.

4. Between naps is now around a little over or under the 2hour mark. Sometimes 1h45ish, sometimes 2h10ish. Sometimes I will settle her to sleep, but it takes so long I think she reaches that overtired threshold, so it is then about 2.5hrs between naps.

5. The nap routine is quite short. I bring her into the bedroom saying ‘It’s sleepy time’, we go around and close the blinds and curtains, as I tell her “here we go, let’s close these”, lay her on the bed and put her sleeping bag on (if it is a hot day I will skip this step), say to her “let’s put on our water music” and I put on a running water sound clip (it’s a 10hr YouTube clip, the phone is face down), then I’ll hold her to my chest rocking a little and sing twinkle little star. Usually I sing it a few times, patting her back. Often I’ll need to hold her like this for a while. If she’s unsettled I’ll put her in the sloth hold position which she often likes- especially if sometimes she has a burp or fart that’s giving her jip and preventing her from settling. Sometimes it can take as little as 10minutes, sometimes an hour.

A few times I have put her on the bed before her eyes are fully closed and she has drifted off to sleep- sometimes she fully wakes up & have to start it all over again.

6. Helping her fall asleep by generally holding her, swaying & patting her back till she falls asleep on us. My partner often does the sloth hold with her- sometimes we tag team if it’s been taking a long time, the other will step in & see if they can get her to sleep. At first I would feed her to sleep, but I don’t really do that now. The last few days I’ve done it once or twice just to have a break from taking ages to get her to sleep. But I’ve noticed that sometimes she can be suckling for 20mins, and if the nap is only 40mins long, I literally have only 20mins to rest till she’s awake again- so I’m trying not to do that unless she seems proper hungry.

7. Once she falls asleep I will put her down on the bed. Sometimes before she’s fully asleep. If she has been very unsettled & taken a long time to fall asleep I might hold her for the first 10mins till she’s in a deeper sleep, then put her down.

8. I recently got a set of curtains to make the room darker, as there is a big ranch slider which only had a sunshade- so it wouldn’t get especially dark during the day. Now it gets quite dark, I try to keep the room cool either having the ranch slider open between naps or during the nap….if it’s a bit noisy or windy outside I will close that door & have an overhead fan on. I shut the other doors in the hallway to keep that also dark so light doesn’t peek through. The bedroom is down the other end of the house from common areas, so it’s generally pretty quiet, and I have the water sounds playing for her whole nap.

9. Generally her bedtime has been at 6.50pm. A couple of times she’s woken up at 7.30 briefly, fed and fallen back to sleep.

10. Yes, she wakes during the night usually twice for a feed. On odd occasion it’s been only once. Sometimes she wakes multiple times in the night- but then I saw a video of yours saying sometimes they just need to be settled back to sleep & not fed every time (at first I was feeding her every time…but that was only about two nights I think).

11. Yes, she wears a sleeping bag with arms out.

12. She is not using a pacifier.

13. She hasn’t fully rolled yet, but has been doing half rolls onto her sides.

She seems to be able to sleep much longer periods on her tummy. The other night I kept flipping her onto her back and she woke up four times in the night. Also when I’ve flipped her on her back for day naps she doesn’t manage to have a long sleep. I know it’s against ‘safe sleep’ practices, she is very good on tummy time and has a strong neck.

This morning putting her down for her nap the pyramid almost worked- and with her on her back! Eyes were nearly closed….then she fully woke up & I had to start from scratch 😂😭

But the sleep routine and knowing about her new sleep/wake window times for this age have all only been starting to get implemented since last week.

[Monica Schischka]

Thanks for your reply Emma. Yeah it was a bit of a triple whammy….coming back home after spending 5 weeks with family, and then she had her 3 month imms a few days later, then the sleep got all mucked up and I have no family or friend network where I live- so it has been challenging for sure.

1. I’ve only been properly tracking her sleep the past few days, but generally she wakes up around 6ish. Sometimes it’s that 5am unsettled period, but often I’ll feed her to sleep next to me then she’ll go back to sleep again till 7 or 8ish. The past few days looks like around 6.30 seems to be a common wake-up.

2. It’s only in the past week I’ve been starting implementing the wake, feed, play, sleep routine. A few times in the last two days I have also fed her before a sleep, as she was displaying signs of hunger and was having meltdowns when putting her down- giving her a feed seemed to settle her and get her to sleep. I think with having the longer wake times she was getting a bit hungrier…?? Also I think if I give her a feed before the midday/early afternoon nap then she ends up having a longer sleep for that one.

3. She is having 3-4 naps a day. Usually they are around 40-50 minutes, with one long one around 1h40-2h20ish. Sometimes only 30mins long, but generally around the 40-45min mark.

4. Between naps is now around a little over or under the 2hour mark. Sometimes 1h45ish, sometimes 2h10ish. Sometimes I will settle her to sleep, but it takes so long I think she reaches that overtired threshold, so it is then about 2.5hrs between naps.

5. The nap routine is quite short. I bring her into the bedroom saying ‘It’s sleepy time’, we go around and close the blinds and curtains, as I tell her “here we go, let’s close these”, lay her on the bed and put her sleeping bag on (if it is a hot day I will skip this step), say to her “let’s put on our water music” and I put on a running water sound clip (it’s a 10hr YouTube clip, the phone is face down), then I’ll hold her to my chest rocking a little and sing twinkle little star. Usually I sing it a few times, patting her back. Often I’ll need to hold her like this for a while. If she’s unsettled I’ll put her in the sloth hold position which she often likes- especially if sometimes she has a burp or fart that’s giving her jip and preventing her from settling. Sometimes it can take as little as 10minutes, sometimes an hour.

A few times I have put her on the bed before her eyes are fully closed and she has drifted off to sleep- sometimes she fully wakes up & have to start it all over again.

6. Helping her fall asleep by generally holding her, swaying & patting her back till she falls asleep on us. My partner often does the sloth hold with her- sometimes we tag team if it’s been taking a long time, the other will step in & see if they can get her to sleep. At first I would feed her to sleep, but I don’t really do that now. The last few days I’ve done it once or twice just to have a break from taking ages to get her to sleep. But I’ve noticed that sometimes she can be suckling for 20mins, and if the nap is only 40mins long, I literally have only 20mins to rest till she’s awake again- so I’m trying not to do that unless she seems proper hungry.

7. Once she falls asleep I will put her down on the bed. Sometimes before she’s fully asleep. If she has been very unsettled & taken a long time to fall asleep I might hold her for the first 10mins till she’s in a deeper sleep, then put her down.

8. I recently got a set of curtains to make the room darker, as there is a big ranch slider which only had a sunshade- so it wouldn’t get especially dark during the day. Now it gets quite dark, I try to keep the room cool either having the ranch slider open between naps or during the nap….if it’s a bit noisy or windy outside I will close that door & have an overhead fan on. I shut the other doors in the hallway to keep that also dark so light doesn’t peek through.