[Laura Oliva Trastoy]

Sounds perfect, Emma. Will do as you suggest and come back in a couple of weeks with an update.

However, I have one quick question: during this whole week Lia has been showing king of random wake windows (Tuesday around 3h, Wednesday 2h, today, by now, 1,5h…). Also, she has consistenly, waken up crying during bedtime after 45min. So I put her to sleep and she is waking up after 45 min directly crying and clearly upset, she even refuses the breast and needs to be settled by rocking her in my arms or by husband’s. I feel she is not having much deep sleep during this first cycle, since I cannot escape the bed without her noticing. This is completely new and I’m a bit confused, honeslty.

She is now mastering rolling back (from tummy to back). I was wondering if this shortened wake windows are due to her getting mlre tired quicker, and if this thing during bedtime is developmental, or related to over/undertiredness.

Thank you un advance! 🙂

[Laura Oliva Trastoy]

Hi Emma 🙂

Sure, I would love your guidance!

Regarding daytime sleep:
OK, understood, I’ll try to reduce a bit the daytime sleep. I’ve tried to push the first nap, as you suggested. By now, I’ve managed to get the first wake window from 1h to 1h30; if I try to extended it more, she dysregulates. For exmaple, today we got up at 06:50,and first nap has gone from 08:30 to 10:00. I’ll continue pushing very little by little to try to get to 09:00.

<i style=”font-weight: bold;”>One question: is the goal to achieve a first nap by 09:00 to 10:30, then a second nap around 12:30 to 14:00, and the a short nap around 16:00 to 16:45, aprox? and have a bedtime around 19:30 then?

I’ve been registering her sleep, and I think she needs around 10h of nightsleep, I don’t think she is a 12h baby (for the last 4 days, for example, 2 of them we got until 07:00AM without split nights if we went to bed around 20:30; the other 2, we went to bed around 19:30, and she woke up around 05:00 – 05:30). So, if she only “manages” to have 10h nightsleep, I guess I shouls try to give her at least 3,5h of daytime sleep, with longer naps in the mornings and a shorter one in the afternoon so that she builds enough sleep pressure for the night, right?

Regarding independent sleep:

Before both crisis hit, we were trying to get her fall asleep “independently” for bedtime and the first nap. My goal was to ,at least, have her sleep without the breast, and ideally falling asleep on the bed. We implemented a nap routine (go upstairs to the bedroom, feed, lower the blinds, undress, put on the sleep sack, rock her and shush), and a bedtime routine (same as nap routine, but with a bath as first step). I achieved the no-breast goal almost 100% of the times; the falling asleep on the bed was most difficult. I only achieved it properly once: she fell asleep with me gently balancing her from side to side. The rest of the times, as soon as I put her on the bed, drowsy, she would just full wake up and start to shrink, stratch and twist, until I pick her up or she starts crying. So I was rocking her to sleep, then puting her on the bed and she would have a brief moment of conciousness, but would continue sleeping with a gentle balance.

However, aroung week 13 everything changed. She would need the breast to fall asleep and no balancing was working, even if put down asleep. So we’ve been contact napping. The only way to have her sleep alone is by me laying with her on the bed, offering the breast, and “escaping” when she falls asleep.

Currently, I think the breastfeeding crisis has ended, and I feel we also passed the peack of the regression, so I started a few days ago to reduce gradually the breast-to-sleep. I’m focusing on nightime specially, following the method you explain in one of the videos of the course. I’ve identified 4 full night feeds, as soon as she is no longer eating, I unlatch the breast and she gets to sleep with me caressing her or gently patting (cosleeping). For the rest of the awakes, I let her suck for 3 minutes aprox, and then unlatch. She is accepting this wuite well, but if I don’t let her at least these 3 minutes and try to rock her, she will just wake up. For the naps, we continue with the routine; she will ask for the breast while I’m rocking her, and I’m currently offering it until drowsy, then unlatch and get her to sleep by rocking her. She is now accepting it quite well (needs 1 minute of rocking with few protest). However, she is more clingly that normal (which is A LOT, really); could it be related to the breast thing?

The idea is to start having all the naps in her room, so we’ve put a floor level bed there, with lots of cushions on the floor (so that I can lie with her on the bed if necessary, but at least she will get used to her bedroom).

Again, I would love to have your guidance on that point. Thank you for being so understanding 🙂
And thank you in advance!

[Laura Oliva Trastoy]

Hi Emma,

Thank you for your kind words 🙂

Regarding the naps:

Here’s the detail, thank you for taking a closer look!
The times may vary 30 min earlier or later, depending on whether she wakes up closer to 07:00 or to 07:30. The example below shows today’s naps, she woke up at 06:50:

• First nap: from 08:00 to 09:30 (1h30): she will only sleep so long if I help her, otherwise she would wake up after 45 min, aprox, but it’s clear that she wants to sleep more (she seeks my contact, or the breast, and protest if I don’t help; when she is ready to wake up she just opens her eyes and looks around, streches and starts babbling). Anyway, I’m currently going back to bed with her after having breakfast and playing a bit, so that I have also some extra rest, so I help her continue sleeping if she needs to.
• Second nap: from 11:05 to 13.00 (2h): in the carrier
• Third nap: from 15:15 to 16:00 (45 min)
• Fourth nap: from 17:50 to 18:10 (20 min)
• Bedtime: 20:00

The following example is from one day without long first nap:

• First nap: from 08:20 to 09:00 (40 min)
• Second nap: from 11:00 to 13:00 (2h)
• Third nap: 14:40 to 15:10 (30 min)
• fourth nap: from 17:10 to 18:10 (1h)
• Bedtime: 19:45

Thank you!