-
Hi Monique,
I am having a great week – the kids are healthy, so I was able to get some things done, which is always good. 😂 Thanks so much for asking!
I’m sorry to hear the first night was tough for your little one.
Unfortunately, it’s normal for the first few nights and days to be a bit rocky. Right now, your baby is used to falling asleep with a pacifier, so taking it away is going to be a challenge for her. She’s going to need some extra support from you to learn how to fall asleep without the pacifier. As she gets used to this new routine, you should notice that her protests reduce.
As for how long you let her cry while you’re rocking her, it really comes down to how you’re all feeling in the moment. If you feel okay with the situation, continue to rock her gently until she calms down or falls asleep (she will calm down – it might take a little while the first night, but the amount of time she is distressed will decrease for the next nap, and the next etc). As you’re rocking her in your arms, make sure your rocking is slow and rhythmical rather than fast and jerky. Doing it fast is alerting and stimulating so it may cause her to fuss more. Also, bobbing up and down in a vertical motion may help her calm down quickly, as moving up and down on a vertical plane is calming.
Sometimes, it can be helpful to view the crying as how your daughter tells you that she is tired and needs your help. And that is precisely what you’re doing as you rock her in your arms.
If you find this approach too distressing, then there is a gentler approach you can try, where you can still use the pacifier in the bedtime and nap routines but remove it just before she drifts off to sleep. It looks like this:
1. When she is tired, let her suck on the pacifier while you complete the pre-sleep routine.
2. At the end of the pre-sleep routine, lay her in her crib with the pacifier still in her mouth.
3. Then, use the settling pyramid to help her fall asleep.
4. Just before she drifts off to sleep, gently remove the pacifier by placing your little finger between the pacifier and the corner of her mouth. This breaks the seal and allows you to pop the pacifier out of her mouth.
5. This works for some babies, and they fall asleep without the pacifier. But for other babies, it may cause them to stir more (at which point you use the settling pyramid to help them fall asleep), and for others, it causes them to wake up fully.
If, after using this method for a few days, you notice that she always wakes up fully when you pop the pacifier out, it indicates that this gentler approach isn’t working, and you may need to remove the pacifier.
Does this make sense?
Emma